Hiding My Heart
by iamkellylouise
Summary: He hurts her in a way she never thought he would and they both believe it's the end. But nothing is ever that simple. AU 4x15.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So this is set after 4x15, if Addison had come back a little sooner than she did, and Sam was more of an ass than he actually is, at first, kind of, you'll get the gist I'm sure! ****It's going to be a long-ish fic and I'm sure I'll frustrate you more than once but trust me guys! Just trust me!**

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><p><em>I wish I could lay down beside you<br>__When the day is done  
><em>_And wake up to your face against the morning sun  
><em>_But like everything I've ever known, you'll disappear one day  
><em>_So I'll spend my whole life hiding my heart away_

Addison yawned as she climbed out of her car after the drive back from the airport, she took out the keys to Sam's house and walked across to his house, as she entered she slipped off her shoes and coat and walked slowly up the stairs, the door to his bedroom was slightly open and she could see the light of one of the lamps, she froze when she heard a moan that definitely didn't belong to Sam, and then one that did, her heart started to pound in her chest but she didn't stop herself from taking the extra steps to push open his bedroom door as slowly as she could, it felt as if her whole world was spinning as her eyes connected with the two people wrapped around each other in the middle of the bed, thrusting against each other.

"I guess I really know how Derek felt now huh?" she choked out causing Sam and Naomi to leap apart, pulling the sheets up to cover themselves "Oh god, I think I'm going to be sick" she said with a sob, bursting through to Sam's bathroom and leaning over the sink, she retched but nothing came up, with tears blurring her vision she stumbled back out of the bathroom and she moved as quickly as she could down the stairs, ignoring Sam's voice as he called out after her, as she reached the front door she scooped up her shoes and coat and struggled to get the door open, Sam took his chance to slip in front of her.

"Get out of my way" she growled "Get the hell out of my way"

"Addie just, just listen to me" he stuttered.

"I never, ever want to see you again" she spat "You are _nothing_ to me anymore, you are, you are dead to me Sam, you promised me you wouldn't hurt me, you promised me you wouldn't be like them, you promised, you promised" she sobbed, hitting him in the chest.

"I'm so sorry, it just, it just happened, she was just there…"

"No" Addison almost screeched, cutting him off "When this happened to me, when Derek found me and Mark together, I said it was because he was there, I said that to him, and it was true, he was there and Derek never was, it had been years since he was there but, but me? I have always been there Sam, I have always been there for you, even when, even when we weren't together I tried to be there for you and the one time, the one time I need you" she said tearfully "The one time I need you, truly need you, I find you in bed with, with her, of all the people why did it have to be _her_?"

"I am so so sorry" he said with a slight whisper "Please just don't, don't leave me, please"

"I'm already gone" she whispered back, she shoved him out of the way and stormed over to her own house, as she slammed the door behind her Amelia skidded into her view.

"Oh" she said clutching her chest a little "It's just you….what's wrong?" she frowned as she noticed the tears streaming down her face.

"Did you know she was there?" she asked tearfully "Naomi?"

"Well, yeah, they're looking after Olivia for the weekend"

"Oh god" Addison choked out "They did it with Olivia in the next room?"

"Did what Addie?" Amelia asked worriedly.

"Please don't make me say it" she whispered tearfully "I keep seeing it and I can't, I can't say it…"

"Oh Addison" Amelia said rushing forward and pulling her into a tight hug "It's ok, it's ok, I'll make them pay alright? I will make them pay for this"

"Please don't" Addison sobbed "Please don't do anything stupid, I don't, I don't think I can be alone right now, please"

"Ok" Amelia whispered "It's ok, I'm not going anywhere, what, what do you want to do? I could get you some wine or…."

"No" Addison said instantly "No just, just promise me you won't do anything stupid"

"I promise Addie" she said softly "Why don't you try and get some sleep?"

"I'll try" Addison sniffled "I can't believe he did that Amelia, I really can't"

"I know" Amelia sighed "I'm so sorry"

"I don't know what to do" she said tearfully.

"Let's just, sleep on it" Amelia said quietly "Come on" she took Addison's hand and led her up the stairs where they both fell to sleep in Addison's bed.

~x~

"Addison" Amelia said quietly as she shook her arm.

"Hmm, what?" Addison mumbled tiredly.

"I've gotta go to work" she sighed "I won't stay the whole day, but I have to go in…"

"Go" Addison yawned "I'll be fine, I swear just, promise me you'll control yourself"

"I promise I'll try" Amelia said with a slight laugh.

"I guess that's the best I'm gonna get huh?" Addison said with a small smirk.

"Do you know what you're gonna do?"

"I, all I know is right now, I don't want to see either of them, other than that I don't know what I'm doing"

"I'll call you later" Amelia said squeezing her hand "Bye Addie"

"Bye" Addison said with a small smile, as soon as the bedroom door was closed she rolled over and pulled the covers up before falling back to sleep.

~x~

"Morning" Amelia said as she walked into the conference room and took a seat next to Charlotte.

"Morning" everyone replied.

"Isn't Addison supposed to be back today?" Violet asked.

"Addison won't be coming in today" Amelia said simply, her eyes glancing briefly to Sam's.

"Is everything ok?" Sheldon asked.

"Sure it is" Amelia nodded.

"Then why is there tension?" Cooper asked as he noticed the tense looks between Amelia, Sam and Naomi.

"Oh I don't know Cooper, I think maybe Sam could answer that question for you, or maybe you would do the honour Naomi, because I know you're sure as hell not going to make me say it" Amelia said with a sharp laugh.

"Ok seriously, what's going on?" Pete asked.

"You have no right to say anything…." Naomi said to Amelia.

"No right?" Amelia laughed as she stood up "No right! Were you the one awake half the night holding on to your best friend while she sobbed her heart out? No, you were the one fucking the man she loves" she spat "You do not get to tell me my rights, you do not get to tell me to do anything _Naomi_, you don't deserve anything from me, you have no idea how hard it is for me not to climb over this table and beat the crap out of you so don't you dare even start with me"

"Amelia, stop" Sam said shakily "Just stop"

"That's it Sam, jump in to rescue her" Amelia said sarcastically "Y'know what, screw this, I'm going to the hospital to find a surgery because if I don't cut something, well I'd guard your manhood asshole"

"Wait, wait, wait" Pete said firmly as Amelia started to walk away "Are you seriously saying Addison found them…."

"She came home early from Connecticut because she missed him" Amelia said quietly "Because she'd spent the whole week clearing out her mothers stuff and, making sure her father and brother didn't drink themselves to death, she came home because she wanted to climb into bed with the man she loves and have him hold her like he promised he would, she wanted to come home to him and when she opened his bedroom door, she found _her_ with her legs wrapped around him, so yeah, I am seriously saying that Addison found them together, and I hope they both realise that they will never be forgiven for that" as she finished her sentence with a breath Amelia turned again and walked out of the now silent room, Pete slowly stood up and took the steps towards Sam, before anyone could breathe he pulled him from his chair and punched him in the jaw before storming from the room.

"You deserved that" Violet spat as she followed him, Charlotte, Cooper and Sheldon all followed after her, not even glancing to Sam or Naomi who was sobbing into her hands.

"What did we do?" she choked out "They all hate us"

"I think it's more me they have the problem with" Sam mumbled as he rubbed his jaw.

"You, you need to talk to her" Naomi sniffled "You have to talk to her"

"And say what Naomi!" he exclaimed "I apologised, what else can I say!"

"I don't know" she whispered.

"Well neither do I" Sam said quietly as he walked out of the room.

~x~

Addison sat on her sofa sipping on her coffee, listening to the sounds of the waves coming from outside, she turned her head when she heard the front door open and close "Amelia?" she called out.

"No it's, it's me" Sam said quietly as he moved into the living room.

"Get out" she said shakily "Get the hell out of my house"

"I just want to talk…."

"I don't want to hear what you have to say" she spat, she stood and put her coffee on the table in front of her, crossing her arms across her chest defensively "Get. Out."

"Addie please just listen to me, I know what I did was wrong, I know it, I can't even believe that I did that, I am so, so sorry, I'm not expecting you to forgive me but, you can't give up on us…."

"I didn't give up on us" she said tearfully "You gave up on us the minute you took her to your bedroom, now please just, get out of my house" she sighed with defeat "I want my keys back, and anything you have over there that's mine, leave it on my deck, if I come back to work you will not speak to me unless it's about a patient, and you can tell Naomi that if she even dares to breathe a word to me, she will not know what's hit her, ok?"

"Addie please…."

"I said ok?"

"Ok" he sighed "Ok"

"I want my keys back"

He took the keys from his pocket and put them on the side, she turned away from him and Sam took a moment before leaving the house.

_Chapter 2 to follow…._


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Only a short chapter but it's a lead in to the real stuff! Thanks for everyone's comments and tweets, I have to say again TRUST ME! **

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><p><strong>1 week later.<strong>

As Sam reached his house he instantly started to frown as he saw the truck parked on Addison's drive and several men walking in and out of the house with boxes in their arms, he parked up and climbed out of the car, he walked into the open door and found Addison talking into her cell.

"Ok, ok I'll see you then, ok, bye, love you too, bye" she smiled before hanging up.

"What the hell is going on?" he exclaimed.

"What are you doing here?" she asked coldly.

"I want to know why you've got people taking boxes of your stuff out of the house!" he exclaimed.

"I don't think that's any of your business"

"Well what about me as a business partner? As a business partner I deserve to know if someone I work with is leaving!"

"There's a letter of resignation waiting at the office, effective immediately, Sheldon has bought out my shares, now you can leave" she said simply.

"You can't seriously be leaving Addie" he said with a slight whisper.

"You can't seriously expect me to stay" she said quietly "All I can see when I look at you is that image of you and her, when I look at your house, I see it, I hear your car pull up outside, I see it, every little thing that reminds me of you, it makes me see it Sam, and I cannot stay here anymore, I'm moving away and nobody can stop me, nobody, especially not you"

"Addison please, please just give me another chance" he begged "Please, I love you, I love you, so much, please, I will do anything, anything, I'll, I'll move with you, we can move together, a fresh start, you and me…please, I love you, I love you Addie"

"Well I don't love you" she said firmly, tears filling her eyes "Now get the hell out of my house"

"You don't mean that" he whispered "I know you love me"

"I stopped loving you the second you broke your promise" she said shakily "I do not love you, I do not want to be with you, I don't even want to think about you, you are nothing to me anymore, nothing, and you'd do well to remember that"

"Please" he whispered, pressing their foreheads together "Please, please don't go, please, I'll do anything, please Addie" he choked out "Please"

"It's too late" she said quietly "Now get out"

"You heard her Sam" Amelia said coldly as she walked down the stairs "Leave before I throw you out myself"

"And what about you?" Sam sniffled "Are you just going to let her go?"

"I'm going with her" she said simply "I don't exactly have much to stay for if she leaves, since the only other person I really trusted was you and you broke that trust the minute you hurt her, it's time you went home now"

"Please just, please try and stay" he whispered as he pressed his lips against Addison's forehead "I love you so much"

"Goodbye Sam" she said quietly, as soon as Sam had reluctantly left the house Addison broke down, sobs racking her entire body.

"Hey" Amelia snapped as the removal men stopped and stared a little "Just keep packing up the boxes or the tip I have in my purse won't be seeing your hand any time soon" they instantly started moving and Amelia slipped down onto the floor beside Addison, holding her tightly in her arms as the cries continued.

~x~

"If that's Sam…." Addison started with a sigh as she sat with Amelia later that night on the sofa in the living room, the larger pieces of furniture being the only pieces left.

"I don't think he'd be that stupid" Amelia smirked as she stood up and walked to the door, as she opened it she found Violet, Pete (who had Lucas in his arms), Charlotte, Cooper and Sheldon all stood in the doorway, pizza boxes piled in Cooper's arms.

"Were you not going to tell us?" Violet asked "Were you just going to leave?"

"We didn't really think it through all that much" Amelia sighed.

"Well, at least invite us in so we can say goodbye Shepherd" Charlotte sighed back.

"Come on in" Amelia said stepping aside and letting them all filter into the house.

"Wha…what are you all doing here?" Addison stuttered.

"Your goodbye meal" Cooper said as he placed the pizza boxes onto the coffee table "Even if it is a mistake for you to leave"

"Addie you know we're on your side right?" Pete sighed "If it's them being at the practice, we can, we can push them out…."

"No" Addison said firmly "I don't want that to happen, I just want to move on, I appreciate it but, you guys, especially the three of you" she said gesturing to Cooper, Violet and Pete "You've known them for years, you built up that practice with them, and even though, even though I hate them for what they did, they're still your friends, and I would never expect those friendships to end for me"

"We've known them for years but we never thought, we never thought in a million of them that they'd do that" Violet sighed "And you, Addison you're part of this, you're part of us, the practice, without you the practice wouldn't still be here, you can't just leave us"

"I have to go" Addison said with a slight whisper "Please just, let me go ok? Don't make this any harder than it already is"

"Promise us you'll call" Pete said quietly "Both of you, promise you'll call us"

"I promise" Addison smiled "I'm not ever going to give up the chance to speak to this little one am I?" she said as she reached out to tickle Lucas "You should be in bed Mr Wilder"

"I think one last night with his Aunt Addie is what he needs" Pete smiled, putting him into Addison's arms.

"I'm pretty short on furniture right now guys" Addison chuckled lightly.

"We'll make it work" Sheldon smiled.

"Now who wants pizza?" Cooper asked.

"Pizza!" Lucas grinned, everyone laughed and they all sat down together, eating pizza as if nothing was going to change.

_Chapter 3 to follow…._


	3. Chapter 3

**2 months later.**

"Just let me run some blood" Amelia sighed heavily as she followed Addison into the doctors lounge where Callie, Arizona, Mark and Derek all sat having lunch together "Addie come on, you've looked like shit for weeks"

"Oh thanks" Addison said dryly "Thank you very much Amelia, really"

"Y'know, you have looked a little peaky" Arizona said as she sipped her drink.

"Do not join forces with her" Addison glared as she took a bottle of water from the mini-fridge and sat down with a huff "I'm _fine_, I'm just a little tired that's all, I haven't worked full time at a hospital in almost 3 years"

"What if you're dying?"

"Amy!" Derek exclaimed "Don't say things like that"

"But what if she is!"

"Wow you are so dramatic" Callie chuckled "I love it, you're gonna have a crazy family baby" she said to her 7 month bump.

"I'm just worried about you Addie" Amelia sighed "You're barely eating, you hardly sleep, you've been throwing up most days and you think I don't notice, but I do, and I am not going to let you ignore it anymore, so get your ass out of that chair and let me take some blood"

"I always forget how feisty the Shepherd women are" Mark smirked proudly, everyone turned to glare at him slightly "What?" he laughed.

"Addie, what's the harm in a blood test?" Callie asked "She's right, you haven't been yourself, we're just concerned that's all"

"Well unlike the woman I found Sam in bed with I don't eat my feelings" Addison snapped "Any food I eat makes me feel nauseous and everytime I close my eyes to sleep I see them together, excuse me for still being a little upset that I'm still not over my heart being torn apart yet again" as she stood the chair slid back with a screech and her water bottle knocked onto the floor as she stormed out, Amelia took a beat before chasing after her.

"Addie, Addie wait" she called out "Addison please" as she caught up with her she grabbed her wrist and pulled her into a supply closet, Addison choked out a sob and rubbed at her eyes furiously.

"I know what's wrong with me ok?" she cried "That's why I don't need a blood test, I already know"

"Then tell me" Amelia said squeezing her hand tightly "Tell me Addie and whatever it is, whatever it is we can deal with it, we'll deal with it together, just tell me"

"I'm pregnant" Addison sobbed "And it's, it's his"

"Oh Addie" Amelia whispered.

"I thought I was going crazy because, well I thought it wasn't possible but, the signs were all there so I took a ton of tests and, and I'm pregnant" she said tearfully "12 weeks"

"Ok" Amelia said wiping the tears from Addison's cheeks "Ok, it's ok, we can deal with this, we can, just tell me what you want to do and I'll do it"

"Promise me, promise me you won't tell him" Addison whispered.

"Addie…."

"Promise me" she said firmly.

"I promise but, Addie, he could still find out…"

"He won't, not if, not if I make them all promise, please Amelia"

"Ok" Amelia sighed "Ok, I won't say a thing"

~x~

"Ok guys, I really need you to listen here" Addison said quietly as herself Callie, Bailey, Amelia, Mark and Derek all sat in the apartment she shared with Amelia "I asked you here because, I have something to tell you, and I need you to promise me that, that you will support me in the decision I've made"

"Just tell us Addie" Callie said as she squeezed her hand.

"I'm pregnant" she said quietly "12 weeks, and it's Sam's, it can't be anyone else's, and I know, I know you might think this is wrong, you might think I'm being stupid but, I don't want him to know…"

"Addie…" Mark started.

"I don't want him to know" she repeated "As far as I'm concerned he is just a sperm donor, and I really, really just need your support in this because, I won't be able to do it without you, please, for me, please just do this for me"

"Addison you have to be sure" Bailey said quietly "This is a big secret to keep, you say you don't want him there now but, what about when the child asks who it's father is? There are so many things that could, go wrong"

"I know" Addison sniffled "But I just, I can't, I can't trust him with my child, I can't trust him"

"You're sure this is what you want?" Mark asked.

"I'm sure" she nodded.

"Ok" he nodded back.

"Addison" Derek said taking her hands in his "Wherever you are, whatever happens, you and this baby will be part of our family, we are all here for you, and we will support you through this, every step of the way, you're going to be an amazing mother Addie" he smiled "And this child will love you so much"

"Thank you" Addison whispered.

"So, are you gonna grow a little husband for my girl" Callie said with a slight grin as she rubbed her bump.

"I guess we'll see" Addison said with a quiet laugh "Guys, I can't thank you enough…."

"No thanks needed" Amelia said squeezing her hand "Just promise I'm godmother"

"I'm godmother" Bailey and Callie both said quickly.

"I think you'll all have to be godmothers" Addison laughed "And guys will you, will you be, godfathers?"

"Of course we will Addie" Mark smiled "Now why don't we make a toast"

"A toast?" Addison laughed.

"Yep" he nodded, picking up his coffee, everyone else picked up their cups "To Baby Montgomery, and to their kick ass Mommy" he grinned.

"To Baby Montgomery" everyone smiled, tapping their cups together before settling into another conversation.

~x~

**6 months later.**

"I have delivered, too many babies to count, and I always thought the Mom's were exaggerating when they screamed the place down, but they weren't, you weren't" Addison panted, looking to Callie "This hurts"

"Yeah honey, it does" Callie said with a soft laugh "But it's worth it, I promise"

"Is he here? Did I miss it?" Amelia asked as she burst into the room.

"No, but he's on his way very soon" Dr Sarah Davies, Addison's OB, said with a slight laugh "You are fully dilated Addison, it's time to start pushing"

"Ok, ok" Addison sniffled "Where were you?" she asked Amelia.

"My surgery ran over, I had to wait for Derek to take over for me, I'm here now, and we're gonna do this" Amelia smiled, wiping sweat from Addison's face.

"You? It's me who's gotta push this thing out of me" Addison groaned as pain hit her "I need to push now"

"Then push" Sarah smiled "Go"

Addison took a deep breath and started to push hard, her hands holding Callie and Amelia's, she paused for a second and panted before taking a deep breath and pushing again, after a few pushes the head was out.

"Addie you're doing great" Callie smiled "You're doing great, he's almost here"

"I can't do this anymore" Addison moaned, closing her eyes a little as tears fell down her face "It's too hard"

"You can do this Addison" Amelia said squeezing her hand lightly "Come on, he's almost here" Addison let out a slight whimper before taking a breath and then pushing again, Amelia and Callie coached her through all the pushes afterwards and then the room was filled with the baby's cries, Sarah cut his umbilical cord and then lay the baby on Addison's chest.

"Hi" Addison said tearfully "Hi baby, hi Carson, it's me, it's Mommy, you're perfect" she whispered "I love you, so so much, and I promise you, I promise you I won't let anybody hurt you, ever, it's just me and you sweetie, I love you" she kissed his small hand as he brought it up to her mouth, she let tears fall and she laughed a little.

"Worth the pain right?" Callie said softly.

"Every second" Addison whispered.

_Chapter 4 to follow…._

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><p><strong>AN: I have a feeling you guys didn't really think this was the way I was going with this fic, but there's more to this than really meets the eye (kind of :P) I've had some great reviews so far and hope they don't stop! **

**I'm aiming to post every Tuesday but there may be weeks I post on Monday's or Wednesdays, depending on college etc. **

**Much love xx**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This is for 2 ladies in particular who bug me almost every day to post ;P You know who you are! So yeah, another time jump, but this is now our present tense so no more big jumps I swear! You'll get more of an idea of where this story is going very soon and I hope you like it :) Reviews please!**

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><p><strong>4 years later.<strong>

"Hello?" Addison yawned into her cell.

"Addie, it's me"

"Mark, hi, what's up?" she mumbled tiredly "It's…ok so it's only 9 and now I feel old but Carson has been really energetic today…."

"Addison it's Maya" Mark said cutting her off.

"Wha…what?" she stuttered, sitting up a little and wiping her eyes "Maya?"

"She's just been brought in by the paramedics, she's on vacation with her husband and her kid, their car got hit by a cab, it was a complete accident but, she's in a bad way Addie, her husband and kid are fine but, Maya's in a bad way…."

"What, what's going on now?"

"Derek has her in surgery, Amelia's in there too, her brain is bruised in some parts and swelling in others, but I think, I think she'll be fine, it's Derek and Amelia, they're the best"

"No, I know" Addison stuttered "I know, I should, I should get to the hospital"

"Are you sure? I can just call you…"

"No, I want to be there, can you call Callie for me and tell her I'm bringing Carson over?"

"Sure, I'll meet you at the hospital"

"Thanks Mark, bye" Addison sighed, she put her cell down and quickly slipped on some clothes, she dropped her cell into her bag and picked up the overnight bag she always had packed for Carson just in case she was called into the hospital at night, she quietly slipped into his room and carefully picked him up.

"Mommy?" he mumbled tiredly.

"Sshh honey, I'm sorry, Mommy has to go to the hospital, I'm gonna take you to Aunty Callie's, close your eyes baby"

"Mmhmm" he murmured, burying her face in her neck, Addison kissed against his hair before leaving the apartment.

~x~

"Hey" Addison breathed out as she met Mark at the nurses station on the surgical floor "How's it going?"

"They're working slowly but, effectively, do you want to go to the gallery?"

"No, no I should go and find Dink and Olivia, do you know where they are?"

"Over there" he said nodding in the direction of the surgical waiting area "Is his name really Dink?"

"Well, it's a nickname" Addison said with a small smirk "Will you keep us updated?"

"Of course" he said kissing her cheek "Good luck" Addison smiled a little at him before walking over to the waiting area where Dink sat with Olivia sleeping in the chair next to him, hugging his arm.

"Dink?" she said tentatively.

"Wow, it's been a while since somebody called me that" he said with a quiet laugh, turning to look at her "It's just Phil now"

"Phil" she said with a soft smile, taking the seat adjacent to his "Wow, look how grown up she is" she said looking over to Olivia.

"She's 6 now" he said with a proud smile "Thank you for the birthday presents by the way, I mean, Olivia doesn't really, remember you but, it always makes Maya happy so, thank you"

"I might not have been a great godmother to Maya since I left but, I'm not going to just forget about you all, it, it kills me that I've missed out on so much, even though leaving was, the right thing"

"I honestly don't blame you" he said quietly "She, she will be ok, won't she? Maya? I just, I can't, I won't be able to tell Liv if…."

"She will be ok" Addison said squeezing his hands in hers "Derek is the best of the best, and he won't let anything happen to her, she's family to him too"

"I just can't believe I'm here again" Phil whispered "I could lose her again"

"I know, it's, horrible, but she'll be ok" Addison said softly "Have you called, have you called…"

"Yeah" he nodded "They're coming out here as soon as they can, sorry if that's…"

"Hey, don't worry about me" she said with a slight laugh "They're her parents, they should be here"

"You don't have to sit here with me…"

"I know, but I will" she smiled, Phil nodded a little and let out a quiet laugh.

~x~

"Phil, Addie" Derek said with a small smile as he walked into the waiting area hours later with Amelia, Addison yawned a little and turned to him.

"So…?" Phil said nervously.

"She's stable" Derek nodded "I released the pressure on her brain, but I'm going to have to wait for a few hours to see if any more work needs to be done, we're going to keep her on a ventilator until we know that she doesn't for sure, and after that it might take her a little while to wake up, but things are looking positive under the circumstances, I'd suggest you get some sleep"

"I want, I want to see her" he stuttered "Can't I, stay with her?"

"I'll call upstairs and get the nurses to set up a bed" Amelia said with a small smile.

"Mmm, Daddy?" Olivia mumbled as she slowly wake "Is Mommy ok?"

"She's still sick bumble bee but she's getting better, she just needs to have a long sleep" he said gently, stroking some hair from her face "Do you remember who this is?" he said nodding in Addison's direction.

"It's, it's Aunty Addison" Olivia whispered "From the picture Mommy has on the fireplace and, and who sends me presents, and who, who helped me and Mommy when we was sick"

"That's right" Phil smiled "And that's Amelia, she helped when you and Mommy were sick too, and she just helped your Mom's Uncle Derek in surgery, do you want to say thank you?"

"Thank you Amelia" Olivia said shyly, hiding her face a little in Phil's arm.

"No problem sweetie" Amelia smiled "I'll go and get that bed organised"

"And I'll go and get Maya settled into her room" Derek nodded "Addie can you bring them up to ICU in 15 minutes?"

"Sure" Addison smiled, as Derek and Amelia left Olivia stood up and walked closer to Addison, stopping just short of her "Hi sweetheart" Addison said softly "You look, so grown up, and so like your Mommy did when she was 6"

"Thank you for helping me be borned" Olivia mumbled as she wrapped her arms tightly around Addison.

"No problem honey" Addison laughed softly, returning the hug tightly.

~x~

"Hey" Callie smiled as she joined Addison in the coffee cart line the following afternoon.

"Hey" Addison smiled back "Everything ok?"

"Yeah, everything's great, just had a very successful surgery so I'm kind of on a high right now"

"Good" Addison chuckled lightly "I've got a Mom in a very slow labour, she's been at it for almost 20 hours now"

"Wow, I would not want to be her" Callie laughed, they paid for their coffees and started to walk across the overpass.

"Addie" Amelia said running up to them "They're here, Sam and Naomi, they're here, they're talking to Derek right now outside Maya's room"

"Oh god" Addison muttered "Ok, tell me what to do"

"Act normal" Callie said simply "Go to Maya's room, just to ask how she is, be polite and civil and before you know it, they'll be gone"

"Go with that" Amelia said patting her arm "Now go"

"Ok" Addison breathed out, she sent them a nervous smile before walking away from them.

"This isn't going to go well is it?" Callie sighed.

"Nope" Amelia replied.

_Chapter 5 to follow…._


	5. Chapter 5

As Addison reached Maya's room she took a deep breath in, she knocked lightly on the open door and stepped inside.

"How's she doing?" she asked quietly.

"Ad…Addison" Naomi stuttered as Sam tried to wipe the shock from his face "Hi, I didn't, I didn't know if you'd…."

"Maya's still my goddaughter" Addison said simply "What did Derek say?"

"She doesn't need another surgery" Phil smiled "They're taking her off the ventilator"

"That's great" Addison smiled "I told you she'd be just fine"

"Dr Montgomery" a nurse said as she approached her "Is your pager working?"

Addison glanced down to her pager and groaned a little "Dammit, the battery died, what happened? Is it Mrs Taylor?"

"No, no it's your son, Marcy just called up from daycare, he has fever and he's been complaining of ear ache"

"Right um, well can you call upstairs and let them know to get someone to cover me?"

"Sure" the nurse nodded.

"I'll be, back later" Addison stuttered out to the stunned room in front of her before she left.

"Addison" she heard Sam call out from behind her.

"What Sam?" she sighed "I need to go"

"You, you have a son?" he stuttered.

"Yeah, I have a son" she said quietly "I have to go Sam, we'll, talk another time" she mumbled before rushing off, as she reached the daycare she saw her son sat on Marcy's lap crying, another daycare worker let her in and she walked over to them "Hey sweetie" she said softly "Come here"

"It hurts Mommy" he sobbed as he moved over to her lap.

"He's been a little quiet today" Marcy added "And a bit agitated, he started complaining about his ear about an hour ago, we decided to keep checking on him and then I felt his temperature go up, and his ear looks a little red, it's probably an infection"

"It does look sore" Addison said looking to it "Honey was your ear hurting this morning at Aunt Callie's?"

"A little" he sniffled "But I was ok Mommy, I was being brave"

"Oh Carson, you know you can tell us if you don't feel well" she said softly "You don't need to be brave all the time, ok?"

"Ok" he mumbled "Mommy can you stop it hurting now?"

"How about we go and see Aunty Zona? See if she has any medicine to make it better"

"Ok" he sniffled.

"Thank you Marcy" Addison said squeezing her hand lightly "He'll probably be off for a couple of days"

"No problem" she said with a small smile "You just get better Mr Carson" Marcy said softly.

"Come on sweet pea" Addison said standing up and taking Carson with her, his legs and arms wrapped around her, they collected his things and waved goodbye before Addison walked out of the daycare centre and headed up to peds.

~x~

"It'll clear up in a couple of days" Arizona said as she handed Addison a prescription for Carson's ear drops "Tylenol should help with the pain, he's gonna be fine Addison, stop looking so worried"

"No, no I know" Addison sighed "It's just, well Sam and Naomi are here, for Maya, and the nurse came and told me about Carson right in front of them so…."

"Well she shouldn't have done that, not in front of another patients family"

"That isn't the issue" Addison sighed "She knows I know them, she probably just assumed they knew, and now, now they know and, Sam came after me and, I guess he wanted to know why he didn't know but I just rushed off"

"You knew it was a possibility Addie" Arizona said softly "Nothing else needs to be said now does it, not unless you want it too"

"It's been easy, not telling them, well, easier, because we live here, but now, now they know he exists…."

"Just don't, don't rush into anything, just take Carson home and curl up on the sofa to watch cartoons, and think about this all, rationally, before you go and do something you might regret"

"I did the right thing" Addison said, more for herself than Arizona "At the time it, it was the right thing"

"I know" Arizona said gently "Now go on, take him home"

"Ok" Addison breathed out.

"Ok Carson, Mommy's gonna take you home now" Arizona smiled as she approached Carson "Make sure she gives you lots of cuddles ok?"

"Ok" Carson smiled "Thank you Aunty Zona" he said hugging her tightly.

"No problem sweetheart" Arizona smiled, kissing the top of his head.

~x~

"Ok honey, what flavour pudding do you want?" Addison asked as herself and Carson waited in line in the cafeteria before they left.

"Chocolate" Carson mumbled into her leg.

"Chocolate it is" Addison smiled, she picked up a couple of cartons and paid for them, as she walked out of the cafeteria with Carson holding her hand she almost bumped into Naomi.

"S…sorry" she stuttered.

"It's ok" Naomi said quietly.

"Mommy I want to go home now" Carson whimpered "My ear still really hurts"

"I know sweetheart, we're going now, I promise" Addison said as she stroked his hair a little, she caught Naomi's eye as she stared down at the boy next to her, knowing she had seen something familiar in him.

"Your Mom always knows how to make everything feel better" Naomi smiled softly.

"I know" Carson sniffled "She's letting me have pudding cuz I was brave"

"Wow" Naomi smiled "What flavour?"

"Chocolate" Carson smiled "It's my favourite"

"It's my favourite too" Naomi smiled back "Well I'll let you get home, I hope you feel better soon"

"Thank you" he said quietly.

"Come on Carson, let's go" Addison said quietly as she led him away, barely giving Naomi a second glance.

~x~

"Naomi, don't be ridiculous" Sam said with a quiet laugh.

"Sam I am telling you, he looked exactly like you did as a kid, it was like looking at one of your childhood photos, he had Addison's smile but the rest of him, it was all you, and he looked like he was around 4 years old, if you do the math…."

"He is not mine" Sam said firmly "Addison would've told me, she would've told someone"

"Addison left for a reason Sam" she said quietly "She left because we hurt her, it wouldn't, it wouldn't surprise me, that's all I'm saying"

"And what do you expect me to do?"

"I don't know Sam" she sighed "Just talk to her"

"No" Sam said quietly "I'm not, I'm not going to bother her with, anything, she doesn't want to speak to us about anything other than Maya and we should respect that, after what we did we should respect it, I broke her heart for one stupid night with you, and I have tried to justify that to myself for so long but I can't, and I'm not willing to upset her any more while we're here"

"I get that Sam, I really do, but if he is yours, well you should be his Dad" Naomi sighed before walking away from him.

_Chapter 6 to follow…._


	6. Chapter 6

**For Jackie, Chará and Ana :)**

* * *

><p>"But Mommy I don't wanna go to daycare" Carson pouted as himself and Addison stepped into the empty elevator a couple of days later "I want to stay home with you"<p>

"Honey I know you do, but you're all better now and Mommy needs to work today, but I'll try and come and see you at lunch ok?"

"I don't want to go!" he said a little louder, stamping his foot slightly just as the elevator doors opened on the next floor.

"Carson Jonah Montgomery, do not start throwing a tantrum in this elevator" she warned.

"I'd listen to her kid" Mark said as he stepped in "You don't want to be on your Mom's bad side, trust me"

"I'm sorry Mommy" Carson mumbled as he wrapped his arms around her "I just like being with you more than daycare"

"And I like being with you more than work but it's my job honey"

"I know" he sighed "It totally sucks"

"That right there, that's proof our kids spend too much time with Karev" Mark smirked "Sofia called me dude the other day"

"Uncle Alex is cool" Carson grinned up at him "Cooler than you"

"You better take that back Montgomery" Mark said picking him up and tickling his stomach so hard Carson giggled loudly and squealed as they stepped out of the elevator together.

"Uncle Mark stop" he laughed loudly "Stop, stop, I take it back, you're the coolest Uncle in the whole wide world"

"That's better" Mark said as he stopped tickling him "Now, you promise to be a good boy for your Mom?"

"Promise" Carson nodded.

"And you'll be a good boy at daycare?"

"Yep" Carson smiled "Put me down now"

"Ok" Mark chuckled lightly, he put Carson on his feet and ruffled his curly hair a little "Glad you're feeling better kid, coffee later Addie?"

"Sure" Addison smiled with a nod, Mark tickled Carson again for a brief second before walking away, Carson linked his hand with Addison's and they started to walk down the hallway together, not knowing that Sam had been watching them since they had stepped out of the elevator, his face falling into shock at the similarities between him and Carson.

~x~

"Addison" Sam said as he approached her at the nurses station on the OB floor later that day "We need to talk"

"I'm working Sam" she sighed.

"Just 5 minutes, please" he sighed back "5 minutes"

"Fine" she said as she put her chart back in the rack next to her, she gestured for him to follow and they headed for her office "What is it?"

"He's mine isn't he" he said quietly "Your son, he's, he's mine"

"What would give you that idea?" she asked firmly, her heart beating fast inside her chest.

"Naomi she, she, she said she thought he looked like me and, I tried not to listen to her but, I saw you with him this morning and she's right, he looks just like I did as a kid, and, he looks old enough to be mine, so please, I know I don't deserve anything from you, I know you don't like me very much, but if he's mine, Addison I have a right to know"

"You don't have a right to anything" she snapped "You lost all rights to know anything about me when you fucked Naomi"

"This isn't about you Addie!" he said loudly "This isn't just about you! I do have a right to know this, I have a right to know if I have a son! And he has a right to know who his father is"

"What does it matter anyway?" she spat "He's been doing fine without you for the first 4 years of his life"

"So he is mine" Sam said with a slight whisper "God Addison! How could you, how could you not tell me? Tell anyone? All the times you've called Pete and Violet and, the presents you send for birthdays, christmas cards, how could you not have, told anybody? Do you really hate me that much?"

"No Sam" she sniffled "I just loved my son so much that I didn't want any risk of him getting hurt the way I was, maybe that wasn't the right thing to do, maybe I should have told you about him, but every time I thought about it, my whole body was screaming at me not to"

"You can't keep me out of his life anymore" he said quietly "And if you try, I will fight to see him, I'll fight, he is my _son_ Addison, _my__son_"

"Don't you think I know that?" she said with a strong whisper "It hasn't been easy Sam! Every day he looks more and more like you, every day I know he could ask me about you, it hasn't been easy, at all, but you broke my heart, I thought I knew what it felt like but, until then, until that night, I had never felt so much pain" she said tearfully.

"I never wanted to do that to you" he whispered back, his own tears springing in his eyes "Addie I never, ever wanted to hurt you, I don't know why it happened, to this day I don't, which makes me hate myself even more for doing it, because I know you'll never forgive me, and you'll never be able to trust me like you did, but god, Addison you have to let me meet him, you have to let me be his Dad, I promise you I won't let him down, I promise, just let me meet him"

"I, I need to ask him first" Addison sniffled "I need to explain, I'm not going to make him do anything he doesn't want to do"

"I understand" he said quietly.

"And I will never, ever trust you" she said shakily.

"I know" he whispered.

"And if you do anything that upsets him, if you hurt him in any way, if you do let him down, then that's it, you'll be out of our lives for good"

"I know Addison, but I won't, I won't I promise"

"I don't believe in promises" Addison said quietly "Put your number in there" she said passing him her phone "I'll call you if he wants to meet you"

"Ok" he sighed "Thank you"

"Ok" she mumbled before he quietly left the room.

~x~

"Carson honey, Mommy needs to talk to you about something" Addison said quietly as she brushed her hand over his hair, he looked up from his toys and followed her over to the sofa, climbing up onto her lap.

"What is it Mommy?" he asked.

"You might not understand everything I'm about to say, but I want you to listen ok? And remember that I love you very much, and I will always be here for you"

"I know Mommy, I love you too" he smiled.

"Ok, well you know how you don't have a Daddy around like some of the other kids at daycare, how it's just been you and me?"

"Yeah" he nodded slowly.

"Well, honey your Daddy, your Daddy is a man called Sam Bennett, me and him, a long time ago, before you were born, me and him loved each other very much, but then I moved to Seattle, and I didn't know you were in my tummy, and when I found out you were, I didn't tell your Dad about you"

"Why?" Carson frowned.

"Well, we were in a fight, because of some, grown up things"

"But you're, not in a fight anymore?" he asked.

"No, not exactly, not like before"

"So he knows about me now?"

"He does" Addison nodded with a small smile "You see, he's got a daughter, she's a lot older than you, she's 23, her name is Maya, and she came to the hospital with a poorly head and Uncle Derek operated on her to make it all better, so her Mom and Dad came out here to be with her, that's when I told your Dad about you"

"I have a sister?" Carson asked with wide eyes.

"Yeah, you do" Addison smiled softly "And she has a daughter, her name is Olivia, she's 6"

"Do, do they want to meet me?" he asked quietly.

"Of course they do" Addison said as she kissed his forehead "But first you're going to meet your Dad, if, if you want to meet him, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do"

"I want to meet him" Carson smiled "Can we have cafeteria pudding with him?"

"That's what you want to do?" Addison said with a slight laugh "You don't want to go to the park or for a Happy Meal? You want cafeteria pudding?"

"Yep, chocolate flavour" Carson grinned "I want my Daddy to know _all_ of my favourite things!"

"Ok" she whispered softly "Baby I'm, I'm sorry you haven't met him before, Mommy shouldn't have kept you apart, even though I was in a fight with him"

"That's ok Mommy" he said hugging her tightly "I love you no matter what, cuz we're best friends right?"

"Yeah honey, we're best friends" she said softly, she nuzzled into his hair as she held tears inside her.

_Chapter 7 to follow…._


	7. Chapter 7

"Addison?" Sam said tentatively as he approached Addison and Carson in the cafeteria the next day.

"Hi" she said with a small smile "Carson honey, this is Sam, this, this is your Daddy"

"Hi Carson" Sam said softly "It's nice to meet you"

"Hi" Carson said shyly, hiding his face slightly in Addison's arm.

"He's not usually this shy" Addison chuckled lightly "He was pretty much bouncing around the apartment this morning because he wanted to get here"

"That's ok" Sam said with a smile as he sat down "I was shy sometimes when I was your age Carson"

"Carson, why don't you tell your Dad why you wanted to meet him here?"

"Cafeteria chocolate pudding is my favouritest food ever" Carson said with a small smile "It's even better than Aunt Callie's macaroni cheese! Do you like chocolate pudding?"

"Who doesn't like chocolate pudding?" Sam said with a slight laugh.

"Mommy doesn't let me have it every single day though" Carson pouted.

"Honey, if you eat any more chocolate pudding you'll turn into one" she said tickling him a little.

"Don't be silly Mommy" he giggled, laughing more when she stuck her tongue out at him, Sam couldn't help but smile at them "Is, is my sister still sick?" Carson asked.

"Your sister is, getting better every day" Sam smiled "I told her all about you this morning, and she really wants to meet you"

"She does?"

"Of course she does" Sam nodded.

"I have to take her a present, that's what you have to do when peoples are in hospital, what present could I give her Mommy?" Carson asked, looking up at Addison.

"Well, we've got paper and crayons in your bag, you could do one of you amazing drawings" Addison smiled "You could draw her some flowers"

"Yeah" Carson beamed "Does my sister like flowers Daddy?"

"She does" Sam smiled "Have you got a yellow crayon? She likes yellow flowers" Addison pulled some paper and crayons from Carson's bag and put them on the table.

"Ok honey, where's the yellow?" Addison asked.

"Um, this one" Carson smiled, picking up the yellow crayon "And I've gotta use green too" he said picking up the green crayon "I know lots of colours" he smiled at Sam "And Aunt Teeny is teachin' me how to write my name"

"Aunt Teeny?"

"Cristina Yang" Addison laughed "She's a cardio surgeon, Meredith's best friend and Sofia, Mark's daughter, her godmother, and she's Zola's godmother too, Derek's daughter, do you know about her?"

"Yeah, Derek was telling me about her yesterday" he smiled "So this, Cristina, she's good with kids?"

"She pretends she hates kids but, she's their favourite Aunty, Sofia couldn't say Cristina when she started talking so she called her Teeny, it just kind of caught on" she laughed "So um, what did Maya say about, him?"

"She said, and I quote, if I could get out of this bed to hit you, I would, she said I deserved it" he sighed "She just wants to see you both"

"I did what I thought was right at the time Sam" Addison said quietly "I'm not saying it's right, but at the time…"

"I know Addie" Sam said softly "Believe me I know"

"Daddy can I take this to Maya when I'm finished?" Carson asked.

"Well I'll have to see if she's feeling ok, but I should think so" Sam smiled.

"I think I, I might go and see her" Addison said "I want to talk to her about all of this"

"Ok" Sam nodded "I can stay here with Carson"

"Is that ok honey?" Addison asked Carson "Can you stay here with your Dad while I go and see Maya?"

"Yeah" Carson smiled.

"Be a good boy baby" Addison whispered, kissing the top of his head before starting to walk away, she turned back briefly and smiled as she saw Carson chatting away happily.

~x~

"Hey stranger" Addison said softly as she stood in the doorway of Maya's hospital room "You on your own?"

"I sent them all away to get some rest" Maya said with a small smile "It's so good to see you Addie"

"You too honey, but I'd really rather it not be because of this" Addison said with a slight laugh "Again Maya?"

"You say that like it's my fault" Maya laughed as Addison perched herself on the edge of the bed.

"I wanted to be here when you woke up but, Carson wasn't well so…"

"Hey, it's ok" Maya smiled "It's _ok_ Addison"

"I'm so sorry" Addison whispered "I'm so sorry, I've been, the worst godmother to you since I left, I took out, my anger, on everyone and I shouldn't have done that…"

"I didn't speak to my Mom or Dad for a month, and I wouldn't let them near Olivia"

"Maya" Addison said with a slight gasp.

"They did what they did with my daughter in the next room, they hurt someone who has always been there for me, and I hated them for it" she sighed "And when you left, I just didn't want to know them, not for a while at least, I don't blame you for keeping Carson a secret, I blame my parents and that will never change"

"You shouldn't have done that honey" Addison said quietly "You shouldn't, blame them, I made mistakes too"

"Yeah well, we all make mistakes" Maya shrugged "And even though you didn't keep in touch the way I would've wanted, you still sent birthday cards and Christmas cards and, anniversary cards, every single year, and that's how I knew you still cared"

"I promise I'll do better, I promise I'll be there, and Carson, well he can't wait to meet you" Addison laughed "If you're ok to see him, he wants to see you today"

"I'd love to see him" Maya smiled "Bring him up any time"

"Ok" Addison smiled "Well, I should get back to them, he's probably talking your Dad's ear off, I'll see you later?"

"See you later" Maya smiled, accepting a hug from Addison "I missed you"

"I missed you too sweetie" Addison whispered, she kissed her cheek gently before leaving the room and heading back down to the cafeteria.

~x~

"Ok Carson, I know you're excited to meet Maya, but she's still really tired from her operation and her head hurts a little, so you need to be quiet ok?" Sam said gently as he crouched down in front of Carson "She's really excited to meet you"

"She is?"

"Oh yeah, she is, you're her baby brother, you ready champ?"

"Yep" Carson nodded, Sam stood up and opened the door to Maya's hospital room.

"You've got a visitor" he smiled "Maya, this is Carson, Carson, this is Maya"

"Hi Carson" Maya said quietly "It's nice to meet you"

"I did you a present" he said putting the picture he had drawn on her lap.

"You drew this?"

"Yep" he nodded "It was my Mommy's idea cuz I wanted to get you a present to get better and she said I should draw for you"

"Well it's amazing" Maya smiled "Thank you Carson"

"Does your head hurt?" Carson asked worriedly.

"A little, but our Uncle Derek's making it _all_ better"

"Uncle Derek's a really good doctor!" Carson smiled "Not as good as my Mommy though, my Mommy's the bestest doctor in the whole world! Cuz whenever I fall over and bump something all she has to do is kiss it and it feels better! Did she kiss your head yet?"

"No, no she didn't" Maya chuckled lightly "But your Mom did do an operation on me a long time ago, and she did a _really_ good job"

"You did an operation on Maya?" Carson said turning to Addison "But why?"

"Well honey, Maya was in a car accident when she still had Olivia in her tummy, and I had to make sure they were both ok" Addison said ruffling his hair a little "And they were"

"Cuz you're the bestest doctor in the whole world!" he grinned up at her.

"Well what about me?" Sam asked "Am I not a good doctor?"

"Well I don't know that yet Daddy" Carson laughed "I've never seen you be a doctor before!"

"Your Dad is a great doctor" Addison smiled "He fixes broken hearts"

"Like Aunt Teeny and Aunt Teddy!" Carson beamed "That's cool Daddy"

"Thanks buddy" Sam laughed.

"How about I leave you 3 to get to know each other" Addison smiled "I'll come back in a little while"

"You sure Addison?" Sam asked.

"Sure" she nodded "Have some, family time, get to know him, just page me if you need me" she smiled before she left, Carson barely acknowledging her as he chatted away to Maya.

~x~

"Hey" Derek smiled as he walked up to Addison at the nurses station outside of Maya's room "How's it all going?"

"Good" she smiled, not taking her eyes off the window where she could see Sam, Maya and Carson all chatting away "I thought I'd give them some time y'know? I don't think Carson could've cared less if I was there or not" she chuckled lightly.

"Well that's good" Derek smiled as he squeezed her hand "This is a good thing Addie"

"Sam's going back to LA, as soon as Maya leaves, and I don't know how the hell this is going to work, I can't ask him to move here, I don't want him to move here I just know that, I can't go back to LA, I can't leave my life here, I can't take Carson away from everyone, you're all his family, you're all he knows, I've disrupted his life enough already, I can't do it anymore"

"Addie, wherever you are, you and Carson will always be part of our family" he said softly "I said it on day one and I'll say it again, we are here for you, to support you, with any decision you make, all of us"

"Seeing them together now it just, makes me feel so much worse about all of this, about keeping them apart, because look at them Derek, look how happy they are, I kept that happiness from them"

"Addison, when you moved here, when you found out you were pregnant, you had every right to be pissed at him, maybe, maybe not telling him wasn't for the best, but at the time you thought it was, and it doesn't matter now, it doesn't, what matters is that you and Sam sit down, and talk this through like adults"

"I'm just still so _angry_ with him Der" she sighed "I don't know how you're not still angry with me, with Mark, because I'm still so…."

"It was a different time, different circumstances, I mean, I could say the same about you? Why are you not still angry at me for being with Meredith when we were still married?"

"Because it was, it wasn't the same, I know" she said quietly "I don't want to be angry with him anymore, I don't, I guess it doesn't help that she's here too"

"She is sorry…."

"I don't care" Addison said firmly "She can say sorry as much as she wants, me and her are done"

"Ok, ok" he said softly, squeezing her hand "Addie everything will be ok"

"Why can't I just have an easy life?" Addison mumbled, resting her head on his shoulder.

"It's not possible" he laughed, standing with her as they watched Carson, Maya and Sam together.

_Chapter 8 to follow…._


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Changing my posting day to Monday's because I don't finish college until 7pm on Tuesdays and feel like I leave people hanging for too long! Much love to everyone who has reviewed etc. **

* * *

><p>"Addison?" Naomi said quietly as she knocked on the open door of her office the following day.<p>

"Is something wrong?" Addison asked.

"No I just, I wanted to see you"

"Well I don't want to see you" Addison sighed "I would've thought you'd know that by now…but please, come on in" she said sarcastically as Naomi stepped into the office and shut the door.

"I know you hate me" Naomi said simply "And you have every right to hate me, but Addison I am so sorry, so so sorry for what I did, I hate myself for doing that, doing that to you, we might not have been as close as we used to be back then but, you were still my best friend, I still, loved you so much, and I screwed up, I was feeling nostalgic being there with Sam and Olivia, it was like old times and, I kissed him and one thing led to another and…."

"I don't need the details" Addison snapped.

"I know, I know I'm sorry" Naomi whispered "But please Addison, please try and forgive me, Derek forgave you and Mark"

"That was different!" Addison exclaimed, tears coming to her eyes "That whole situation was completely different, me and Derek were a mess when I slept with Mark, but me and Sam, we were happy" she whispered "I thought we were happy, and he promised me he would never hurt me, but he ripped my heart out, he ripped my heart out and you, you stamped on it, do you know how long I stayed away from him because of how much I cared about you? A year Naomi, a whole year I had to pretend I felt nothing for him, I had to play pretend with someone else, because of you, but then we did get together and we were happy and I knew you were less than thrilled but, you didn't hate me, at least I thought you didn't hate me for it, but you must have done to do that to me"

"I have never hated you" Naomi choked out "I could never hate you"

"Well I don't care" Addison said tearfully "I want you to leave, as soon as Maya can go home, you need to leave, and not talk to me again, I can't, I can't even look at you without wanting to hurt you right back, so leave, because I won't be that person, and if, when, I bring Carson to LA to see Sam and the others, you make yourself disappear, ok?"

"Ok" Naomi sniffled, she turned to walk out of the office but turned back, walking over to Addison and wrapping her arms tightly around Addison before she could protest "I miss you" she whispered, she squeezed her a little before finally leaving, as soon as Addison knew she was gone she let herself cry.

~x~

**1 week later.**

"So we'll see you in a month then" Addison said quietly as she stood with Sam in the lobby of the hospital.

"Yeah" Sam smiled.

"Daddy can I stay with you at your house when we come to LA?" Carson asked.

"We'll see what happens baby" Addison said as she ruffled his hair a little "You've gotta say goodbye now ok?"

"I don't want you to go" Carson murmured as he wrapped himself around Sam's legs "Can't you stay a little longer"

"I've gotta go back to work champ" Sam said sadly, moving to kneel down in front of him "But you can call me, tell me all about what you've been up to at daycare, and with Mommy"

"Ok" Carson sighed.

"And you'll be a good boy for her?"

"Yep!"

"Good" Sam smiled, he pulled him into a hug and kissed against his hair a little "See you soon son"

"See you soon Daddy" Carson whispered back, Sam kissed his forehead before climbing to his feet.

"I guess I'll call you" Addison said with a small smile "When we're coming over"

"Sure" Sam nodded "Bye Addie"

"Bye" she replied, he placed a tentative kiss on her cheek before ruffling Carson's hair and heading out of the hospital "Ok baby, how about me and you go and get some chocolate pudding?"

"Ok" Carson said quietly.

"Hey, honey we're going to see him again ok?" Addison said as she crouched down to his level "I promise you"

"Ok" he sniffled "Can, can I take some of my toys with me to Daddy's house?"

"Of course you can baby" she said with a smile "When we get home, why don't we pack up a box of things for Daddy's house and send it to him"

"Yeah! That's a good idea Mommy" Carson beamed "Now can I have some chocolate pudding?"

"Sure" Addison laughed, she kissed his forehead before taking his hand and leading him to the cafeteria.

~x~

**1 week later.**

"Hey guys" Sam smiled as he walked into the kitchen at the practice where Pete, Violet, Charlotte and Sheldon all sat eating breakfast.

"Hey" they all replied.

"So I got a package this morning, from Addie and Carson, in the letter Addie said Carson wanted some toys to play with when he came over here so they sent some, and they sent me this" he said putting a scrapbook on the counter "It's all photos from when he was a baby right up to now"

"So she's really going to come back then" Violet said quietly as she started to flick through the scrapbook.

"Just for a couple of days, and then I'll go out there the next month" Sam shrugged "It's not ideal but, I guess I just have to appreciate any time I can get with him"

"You're lucky you're getting any" Pete muttered.

"I know that" Sam sighed.

"He's beautiful Sam" Violet smiled, trying to change the mood "He looks just like you, but that is definitely Addison's smile"

"He's really happy" Sam smiled gently "He's a really happy kid, and everyone loves him, I can't wait for you all to meet him"

"We'll have to get together at your place" Sheldon smiled "I could show you my barbequing skills"

"I'd rather not get poisoned" Charlotte said dryly.

"You all underestimate me" he replied with furrowed eyebrows.

"It's a good idea though" Pete smiled "Then we can bring Lucas to meet him too"

"Ok" Sam smiled "I'll run it by Addie, but that should be fine"

"What about Naomi?" Violet asked.

"What about her?" Sam asked "She'll understand why she's not invited Violet, Addison's made her feelings very clear"

"I just wish everything could just, be like it was" she sighed.

"You're not the only one" Sam sighed "But we're just going to have to, adjust, just like we have been since Addison left, ok?"

"Ok" she nodded "Well, I guess we should get to work, patients should be here soon" everyone seemed to nod and head off to their offices, leaving Sam and Pete alone.

"It'll get easier" Pete said quietly "It'll be, awkward at first but, she's always loved you Sam, you know that"

"It's not about that anymore" Sam sighed "It's about Carson, we've all got to, remember that, and remember that she's not coming back, god I am so so sorry"

"We know man" he said patting his back a little "Come on, let's work, we can talk more later" Sam nodded, closed the scrapbook of pictures and headed to his office.

_Chapter 9 to follow…._


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: For Jackie on her birthday, lots of love to you :)**

* * *

><p><strong>3 weeks later.<strong>

"Mommy can you see him? I can't see him Mom, what if he's not here?" Carson sighed as himself and Addison walked through the airport in LA.

"He'll be here baby" Addison said softly, scanning her eyes over the crowds of people.

"Mommy he's there!" Carson suddenly exclaimed, pulling away from Addison before she could stop him and running towards Sam who instantly scooped him up in his arms "Daddy!" he beamed.

"Hey champ" Sam said with a slight laugh "It's good to see you"

"Can we go to the beach now?" Carson asked.

"Carson we've only just got here" Addison smirked as she joined them "We'll go to the beach soon though"

"Addie, you look, beautiful" Sam smiled as he kissed her cheeks.

"Uh, thanks" she said quietly "So, what's the plan?"

"Well we can go back to my place for a little while, and then tonight I was thinking we could go out to dinner?"

"Sounds good" she said with a small smile.

"And tomorrow, well everyone wants to see you and meet Carson so I thought maybe we could have a barbeque, Carson and Lucas could play out on the beach and, if you don't want to see them yet it's fine…"

"No, no that sounds like a good idea" Addison smiled "I'd like that"

"Ok" Sam smiled "Well, let's go then" he said taking the handle of her suitcase and leading them out of the airport.

~x~

"Sam, where are we going, we just went past the turn in" Addison frowned as she sat beside Sam in his car.

"Oh, did I not tell you? I don't live there anymore" he replied.

"You don't?"

"No, I moved, about 6 months after you left, I just, didn't feel at home there anymore, it's only 5 minutes away"

"Oh" Addison nodded.

"Here we are" Sam said as he pulled up outside his house 5 minutes later "So, what do you think?"

"It's, nice" she smiled "Looks big for just you"

"Well I wanted room for Maya when she comes to stay" he shrugged.

"You do still have the beach outside your house right?" Carson asked.

"Yeah bud, I do" Sam laughed, they all climbed out of the car, Sam taking their suitcase from the trunk before they walked inside, Carson instantly ran through the living area to the sliding doors at the back of the house, pressing his face and hands against the glass.

"You really do have the beach as your backyard!" he exclaimed "Mommy can we go outside? Please?"

Addison looked to Sam who shrugged with a slight smirk.

"First have a drink and change into your beach clothes, then we can go out" she sighed with a slight laugh, Carson grinned and ran back to her to give her a hug, Sam scooped him up and took him into the kitchen for a drink as Addison opened the suitcase and dug out his beachwear.

~x~

"Do you want some wine?" Sam asked as Addison sat down on his sofa that evening after Carson had finally fallen asleep "I bought a bottle of your favourite" he said holding it out to show her "It is, still your favourite right?"

"Yeah, yeah it is" she said with a small smile "And, I'd love some"

"Ok" he nodded, he took out two glasses and poured some out, passing her a glass as he sat down "To Carson" he said raising his a little "Our beautiful son"

"To Carson" she smiled, tapping her glass against his lightly before they both took a sip.

"Are you sure you're ready for tomorrow?" Sam asked.

"Who's going to be there?" Addison asked.

"Violet, Pete and Lucas, Charlotte, Cooper and Sheldon, that's it"

"Good" she breathed out.

"You really thought I'd invite…." he said trailing off a little.

"I don't know Sam" she sighed "Just know that I'm not prepared to see her"

"I know that"

"And I am so glad you moved" she mumbled "I would never have…."

"You would never have stayed in that house, I know" he said quietly "I didn't even want to stay in that house, that's why I moved and I guess, I guess I still hoped that you'd come back, when I bought this house, I was thinking of you, that's why the closet in my room is so big" he said with a slight laugh.

"What made you think I'd come back Sam?" Addison sighed.

"I didn't, I mean, I hoped" he said quietly "I hoped you'd come back, this is your home and…."

"This isn't my home" she said cutting him off "My home is in Seattle with my son, that is my home"

"I'm sorry" he whispered "I didn't mean to…"

"Let's just not go there ok?" she said quietly "Let's not talk about the past, all we should be concentrating on is Carson"

"I just want us to be ok" Sam sighed "I know we'll never get over what I did, but we have to try and be friends, for Carson we have to try, and for us, Addison you were never just my girlfriend, you were my best friend and I miss that, I miss you, please just try to be my friend"

"I can try, that's it, I can just, try" she sighed.

"Ok then" he smiled "Now let's just, drink wine and, talk"

"Ok" she said with a small smile, sipping on her wine and after an awkward moment, the conversation started to flow.

~x~

"Hey" Violet smiled as Sam let her, Pete and Lucas into his house the following day "So where are they?"

"In the living room" Sam said with a slight laugh "Hey buddy" he smiled, ruffling Lucas's hair.

"Hi Uncle Sam" Lucas smiled as they walked through to the living room.

"Addison" Violet smiled as she spotted Addison sitting on the sofa, Carson sat on the floor playing with his favourite cars.

"Violet" Addison smiled, standing up and hugging her tightly "It's so good to see you, you look great"

"So do you" Violet smiled.

"Addie" Pete smiled softly as he took his turn to hug her.

"Pete" she whispered "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you guys"

"Hey, that doesn't matter anymore, you're here now" he smiled "And this must be the famous Carson"

"It is" Addison smiled "Carson honey, can you say hi to your Aunt Violet and Uncle Pete?"

"Hi" Carson smiled, looking up to them.

"Hi Carson, it's nice to meet you" Violet smiled "I've heard so much about you"

"And this here, this is our son Lucas" Pete smiled, pulling Lucas to stand in front of him.

"Oh Lucas, look at you" Addison said with a slight whisper "You're so big, you have no idea who I am do you"

"You're my Aunt Addie" Lucas smiled "You did surgery on my Mommy and me when I was born and you used to look after me when my Mommy was sick, and you send me cool birthday and Christmas presents"

"That's right" Addison sniffled "Can I have a hug sweetie?"

"Uh-huh" Lucas nodded, Addison crouched down a little and he wrapped his arms around her neck, she hugged him tightly and kissed against his hair.

"Will you tell Carson all about the cool things in LA he can do when he comes to stay with his Dad" Addison smiled.

"Sure" Lucas smiled "You have cool cars" he said to Carson, Carson pushed a car in his direction and Lucas sat down on the floor next to him and they started to play together.

"Well, that went well" Addison said with a slight laugh.

"Lucas can make friends with anyone" Violet laughed "So, how are you Addison? How's Seattle? And Amelia, could she not come?"

"She had a surgery, but she says hi" Addison smiled "And Seattle is, great, it's home, but I do miss you guys, a lot, I'm sorry I didn't keep in touch, properly I mean"

"Hey, like I said, it doesn't matter anymore" Pete said softly.

"I missed you guys so much" Addison murmured as she hugged him again.

"Hey, where's my hug?" Cooper said as himself and Charlotte walked into the living room.

"Cooper" Addison laughed, moving over to hug him "It's good to see you"

"And you" Cooper smiled.

"And you are getting a hug whether you like it or not" Addison said giving Charlotte a hug "How are you?"

"I'm good" Charlotte smiled "Welcome back"

"I'm not back for long" Addison said with a small smile.

"But back for long enough" Cooper smiled.

"I'd introduce you to Carson but, he's pretty content playing with Lucas right now"

"He looks great" Cooper smiled "So do you"

"Ok now you're just sucking up" she smirked "So, who wants a drink? Coffee? Juice?"

"I'll do that Addie" Sam smiled "You sit down, catch up"

"Ok" she smiled as everyone started to sit, they all told Sam their drink orders and he went into the kitchen.

"Hello?" Sheldon's voice called out a minute later "Hey everyone" he smiled as he reached the living room.

"Sheldon" Addison smiled, standing up to hug him "How are you?"

"I'm good, and you?"

"I'm good" she smiled "I bet you haven't missed me one bit have you?"

"The elevator felt empty without you" he chuckled "Y'know you never did pay me"

"Shut up" Addison smirked "Would you like a drink? Sam's making some right now"

"Coffee would be great" he smiled, Addison nodded and walked into the kitchen.

"Sheldon's here, he wants coffee" Addison said to Sam.

"Ok" Sam smiled "So, how are you feeling? It's not as bad as you thought right?"

"No" she said with a small smile "It feels, good, great, to see them again, I just want to find some kind of normal with everyone again"

"You will Addie" he said softly "Carson is going to charm them all anyway"

"Like father like son huh?" she smirked.

"Maybe" he laughed "He's always going to be a Mommy's boy though"

"Maybe" Addison shrugged "But he loves you, you know that right?"

"I know" Sam smiled "Would you take some of these in? There's juice for the boys and those 2 coffees are for Violet and Pete"

"Ok" Addison smiled before taking as many of the cups as she could and taking them out, re-joining the conversations with ease.

~x~

"Ok honey, you sleep well" Addison said softly as she tucked Carson into bed that night "Did you have a nice time meeting everyone?"

"Yeah" Carson smiled "We'll see them again right?"

"Of course we will baby, we're going to the park with Lucas and your Aunt Violet tomorrow while Daddy does a surgery"

"But we'll spend more time with Daddy won't we?"

"We're going to spend lots and lots of time with Daddy, he just couldn't get out of this surgery" Addison said, stroking his cheek "Are you happy Carson? Visiting Daddy?"

"Mmhmm" he nodded "Are you? You like my Daddy don't you?"

"He's your Daddy, of course I do" Addison smiled "And it makes me happy to see you with him"

"Good" Carson smiled "Cuz that means we'll see him again doesn't it?"

"I promise you, you'll see him, not as much as I know you'd like too, but you'll see him, we just have to do things a little differently"

"I know" Carson sighed.

"I love you honey" Addison whispered, kissing his forehead gently.

"I love you too Mommy"

"Sweet dreams" she whispered, she kissed his forehead again before leaving the room and heading downstairs.

"Hey" Sam smiled "Is he ok?"

"He's great" Addison smiled "Today has been nice"

"It has"

"Things are going to be hard, I know that, but, I know it's going to be good for him, being with you"

"I'm glad" Sam smiled softly "Thank you, for bringing him here"

"We have a deal, I'm going to stick to it if you are"

"Absolutely"

_Chapter 10 to follow…._


	10. Chapter 10

**1 month later.**

"Daddy!" Carson said loudly as he ran out of Derek's house, across the decking just in time for Sam to reach the top of the stairs.

"Hello my beautiful boy" Sam smiled, scooping him up in his arms and hugging him tightly "I've missed you"

"I missed you too Daddy" Carson sighed "Mommy's helping a baby today"

"I know, that's pretty cool huh?"

"It's really cool, I'm gonna be a doctor when I grow up too y'know" he smiled "Or a spaceman"

"A spaceman?" Sam laughed "Well I think that is _really_ cool"

"Hey man" Derek said with a small smile as he approached them "Welcome back"

"Thanks, this place, this place is amazing" Sam said, gesturing to the house "I always wanted to come and see it, Carson says he loves it here"

"Cuz we can run around and there's a tree house and Uncle Derek has a telcascope so we can look at stars…"

"A telescope buddy" Derek laughed "Go on, go and get your stuff from Aunt Meredith, she's in the kitchen"

"I'll be right back Daddy" Carson said as he rushed back into the house.

"I'll move his booster seat into your car" Derek said, both him and Sam walked down to the cars, Derek took the seat from the back of his car and then met Sam at his rental car, they stood there silently as he fitted it into the back seat.

"Thanks" Sam nodded "Maybe we could, all meet up, I'd love a tour of this place…."

"You'll have to ask Addie"

"I will, I, I want to be involved with Carson's life here when I visit, I know it's still awkward but, you were good to me when Maya was here…"

"And I'll try to be good to you when you're here for Carson, I do want us to be friends Sam, you just have to understand that, a lot of people around here, they don't know you like I did, they only know what you did, it might have been a long time ago but they hold grudges for a long time, believe me, I've been subject to one of those grudges before"

"So I've got to get into people's good books?" Sam asked.

"Definitely" Derek said with a slight laugh "Carson loves you and tells people about you all the time so, that helps"

"Good" Sam said with a soft laugh.

"Hey" Meredith smiled as she walked towards them, holding Carson's hand.

"Meredith" Sam smiled "How are you?"

"I'm good, thanks" she smiled "You?"

"Glad to be here" he smiled, ruffling Carson's hair gently.

"Here's the spare key to Addison's place" Meredith said, passing it to him "She said she'd try and call before she leaves the hospital"

"Thanks" Sam smiled, putting the key in his pocket "Ok buddy, let's get going shall we?"

"Uh-huh" Carson nodded "Thank you for having me Aunt Meredith" he said, hugging her tightly.

"With manners like that you are welcome anytime sweetie" Meredith said with a soft laugh.

"Bye Uncle Derek"

"Bye Carson" Derek smiled, giving him a high 5.

"Thanks guys" Sam smiled "I guess I'll probably see you around"

"You will" Derek said giving his shoulder a pat, he moved to stand next to Meredith as Sam helped Carson with his seat belt and they both waved them off as they drove away.

~x~

"Hey" Addison smiled as she let herself into her apartment.

"Hey" Sam smiled.

"Hi Mommy" Carson beamed "Did you save the baby today?"

"Yeah honey, I did" she said with a soft smile "The baby is very strong"

"Good" he smiled "Me and Daddy made cookies"

"I thought I could smell something nice" Addison smiled, kissing the top of Carson's head "How are you Sam?" she asked quietly "Was your flight ok?"

"It was good" he nodded "Everyone sends their love"

"Make sure to send it back" Addison smiled "And you picked Carson up ok?"

"Yeah, yeah it was ok, I was thinking we could spend some time with them, Derek said to ask you"

"Sure, we'll set something up, I like Carson to go there when we can so he can burn off all that energy, I always meant to move into a house" she said with a soft laugh "It's just making the time I guess"

"I like this apartment Mommy" Carson smiled "It's ours"

"Me too baby" Addison smiled softly "Now, I suppose we should have some dinner, why don't we treat ourselves to a pizza?"

"Yeah" Carson beamed "Daddy you like Pizza don't you?"

"Sure I do buddy" Sam smiled "We can have some cookies afterwards"

"Ok" he smiled "Daddy come and see my spaceman stuff!" he exclaimed, taking Sam's hand and pulling him towards his bedroom, Addison laughed a little to herself and went into the kitchen to hunt down the pizza take out menus.

~x~

"Daddy?" Carson said quietly as Sam tucked him into bed.

"Yeah buddy?" Sam asked.

"Why can't you live with me and Mommy?"

"Because I live in LA" Sam said with a small smile, stroking Carson's hair gently.

"But why can't you just move? You can get a job with Mommy and you can, you can have my room if you want, and then we'll be a family all together" Carson smiled.

"Carson I know this is, confusing for you" Sam said carefully "But not all families live together"

"I know that" Carson sighed "But it's not fair! Sofia gets to see her Daddy every day and so does Zola and so does Lucas and so does Olivia! And I don't!" he exclaimed "And all because you and Mommy had a stupid fight"

"Carson it's not that simple" Sam sighed "I would love to see you every day, I really would, but it's just, not that simple, I wish I could make you understand son, I really do, just know how much I love you ok? I love you little man"

"I love you too Daddy" Carson mumbled quietly "I just wish we was a family is all"

"I know buddy, I know you do" Sam said softly, kissing his forehead "Sweet dreams" Carson yawned a little and snuggled into his bed, closing his eyes, Sam moved over to the doorway and turned off the light, closing the door but leaving a small gap.

"Do you want a drink?" Addison asked quietly.

"No, no I'm good" he answered, dropping himself down onto the sofa with a heavy sigh.

"Is everything ok?"

"Carson he just, he just got upset, that he doesn't see me every day like other kids see their Dads"

"He'll get used to it" she sighed as she sat down "We all will"

"I don't have anything keeping me in LA, Maya's in New York, everyone would understand…"

"You have a life there Sam, your job, the practice, you can't just move here, we'll get used to this" Addison sighed.

"I can get a job here, I'll go back to LA and make sure they find someone to replace me, make sure they're ok, but then I'll leave, they don't need me there, they can visit"

"You can't do that" she sighed "You can't Sam"

"Why not? My son, the son I've been away from for his whole life because of _my_ mistake, I need to be with him, I'm not going to do this, I'm not going to see him once a month, it isn't fair on him and it isn't fair on me, you have to see that Addison"

"Don't think we're going to be playing happy families…." Addison started.

"I know that"

"And you stay out of my business, this is about Carson, not me and you"

"I know" Sam sighed.

"And we're not telling him, not until everything is set in stone, I won't raise his hopes like that"

"I agree"

"I'll give Owen a call in the morning, he should be able to give you a job" she sighed "If you want to work at Seattle Grace?"

"Yeah, that'd be great Addie, thank you" he smiled "Thank you"

"Just, try not to let him down ok?" she said quietly.

"I promise" Sam said softly "I know you hate that word but I do, I promise I'll never let him down"

"I'm, believing you" Addison nodded slowly "Just, please don't move here unless you really want too"

"I do" he smiled "I want to be here"

"Ok" she sighed, Sam smiled at her a little before she turned on the TV and they watched it in silence.

~x~

"Hey" Sam smiled as he walked into the conference room at the practice a few days later.

"Hey" Violet smiled "How was Seattle?"

"Good, Addie and Carson say hi" he smiled "And uh, well we did some talking and, I've made a decision"

"A decision?" Pete repeated.

"I'm moving to Seattle" he said simply.

"Dammit" Cooper groaned.

"You can pay me later Coop" Charlotte smirked, patting his chest lightly.

"You made a bet?" Sam asked with a raised eyebrow.

"We knew you'd never be able to stay away from them for long" Sheldon said with a small smirk.

"So, when are you leaving?" Naomi asked quietly.

"After I've got everything settled here, I want to help you look for another doctor, I wouldn't just leave you in the lurch, I'll need to sell my house, find somewhere in Seattle to ship my stuff too, and then I'll leave, but we're not tell Carson until everything is finalised, I don't want to raise his hopes so if you speak to him on the phone…"

"We'll keep it quiet" Violet smiled.

"So does this mean you and Addison…" Pete started.

"Are friends" Sam nodded.

"I give it a couple of weeks before they're back together" Charlotte muttered to Sheldon.

"Mmhmm" he murmured back.

~x~

"Sam" Naomi said quietly as she knocked on his open office door.

"Hey" he said, looking up from his paperwork "What's up?"

"I hope, I hope you'll be happy in Seattle"

"I think I will, I can't wait to be with Carson more" he smiled softly.

"I know" she smiled "And if you and Addison get back together…"

"We won't…."

"If you do, just don't break her heart again, don't, don't let someone mess things up for you like I did"

"Nae we both made that mistake" Sam sighed "Both of us"

"Maybe" she said with a small shrug "I'll, see you around Sam"

"Bye Naomi" Sam said with a small smile, she backed out of the office and Sam got back to his paperwork.

_Chapter 11 to follow…._


	11. Chapter 11

**1 month later.**

"Can we have chocolate pudding before we go?" Carson asked as he walked hand in hand with Addison towards the lobby "Please Mommy?"

"We've got to go and have dinner first baby" Addison said with a small smile "But I think we've got some pudding at home, you can have it for dessert"

"Well I hope there's pudding for me too" Sam said as he approached them.

"Daddy!" Carson exclaimed, jumping up into his arms "We're supposed to come to LA next!"

"Well, how would you feel, if I came to live in Seattle" Sam smiled.

"Really?" Carson whispered "Forever?"

"Forever" Sam said with a smile "I've got a bedroom at my new apartment with your name on it"

"So I can stay with you? More than once a month?"

"Yeah honey, you can" Addison smiled, ruffling his hair a little "How about we try for once a week"

"Really?" Sam asked.

"Really" she nodded "We'll have to work it around our schedules but, once a week sounds fair to me, you'll see each other more than that obviously but, as for staying over, once a week…."

"Sounds great" Sam smiled "Huh buddy?"

"Uh-huh" he smiled "Mommy can Daddy come for dinner?"

"Sure" Addison nodded "Don't worry Sam, I can cook now, well enough to feed Carson anyway, Callie forced me into letting her teach me"

"Ok" he laughed "Let's go then" he put Carson on his feet and held his hand, Carson reached out and held Addison's and they walked out of the hospital together.

~x~

"Daddy?" Carson said quietly as Sam tucked him into bed "Are you really staying?"

"I'm really staying" Sam smiled "Promise"

"But you said you couldn't leave LA, cuz of your job"

"I know, but it's more important for me to be here with you, so your Mom got a job for me at the hospital, ok?"

"Ok" Carson smiled "I love you Daddy"

"I love you too little man, sweet dreams" he kissed Carson's forehead before walking out into the living room.

"Hey" Addison smiled "Is everything ok?"

"Everything's, great" Sam smiled "Thank you for, letting me move here"

"I couldn't say no Sam, I don't control your life" she sighed "It's, the right thing for you to be here for him, I think we just have to try and, let the past be the past"

"That's very, grown up of you" he said with a slight smirk.

"I might spend most of my time with a 4 year old but I can be a grown up too" Addison smirked "You should go home and sleep, it's been years since you've worked hospital hours and y'know, you're much much older now"

"Thanks Addie" Sam laughed "I'll see you tomorrow then"

"Ok" she smiled "Can you meet me at the daycare at 9? We need to get you signed off to pick him up"

"I'll be there" he smiled, he walked over to her and kissed her cheek gently "Goodnight Addison"

"Goodnight Sam" she said quietly, Sam let himself out of the apartment and Addison let out a slight sigh before making herself a drink and sitting down on the sofa, trying to relax before bed.

~x~

"Sam" Derek said with surprise as he walked into the attending's lounge with Meredith, Zola, Mark, Callie, Arizona and Sofia.

"Hi" Sam smiled.

"Ok Zola, say goodbye to Daddy" Meredith smiled.

"And you Sofia, say goodbye so Mommy can take you to daycare" Arizona smiled.

"Bye Daddy" Zola smiled, hugging Derek's legs, Derek reached down and kissed her forehead.

"Bye Zo, have a good day, I'll come and see you later"

"Ok" she smiled, Sofia said goodbye to Mark and Callie before Meredith and Arizona took the kids out of the room.

"Just, say what you have to say" Sam said simply.

"Has Addie seen you yet?" Callie asked.

"I had dinner with her and Carson last night" he nodded "We're trying to be friends now, for real, and I'd like it if, we could all try and be friends, since I'll be working here from now on"

"If Addison can try then I can try" Callie nodded.

"I still hate what you did" Mark sighed "But like Callie said, if Addison wants to be friends with you then, I'll try, for Carson too, he hasn't shut up about you since they got back"

"All I talk about nowadays is him" Sam said with a soft laugh.

"It'll be nice to have someone else around other than Mark" Derek smirked.

"I resent that" Mark grumbled.

"Ok" Sam said with a slight laugh "Well I better go and find my way to cardio, and get lost, I'll see you guys, soon then"

"I'm heading that way now, follow me" Callie smiled.

"Good luck man" Derek said patting his back as he passed by.

"Thanks" Sam smiled, following Callie out of the room "You want to protect her, I get that" he said quietly as they walked down the hall together.

"Well she's my best friend" Callie smiled "She kind of, disappeared off to LA without even a call until she got there, I only got to see her once a year and when she called, well she was lying to me a lot of the time" she laughed lightly "And then she called me about what happened with you, and I knew, I knew she was telling the complete truth, she was, a mess Sam"

"I know" Sam said sadly "I know I messed up, and I will always, hate myself for that, but I'm really, _trying_, so hard, I know I won't get her back but, I'm trying to be there, for both of them"

"I know" Callie smiled softly "And I think, I think you'll be good friends, and great parents together, it'll probably just take her a while to get used to not doing it all by herself"

"Addie's always wanted to do everything by herself, that's never changed" Sam laughed.

"True" Callie smirked "Well, here we are, Teddy's office is just there" she said pointing out the office "I hope you settle in well Sam, I really do"

"Thanks Callie" Sam smiled "And thank you for, being there for her"

"I'll always be there Sam, always" Callie smiled before walking away.

~x~

"Hey asshole" Amelia smirked as she dropped her lunch tray onto the table next to Sam's, pulling up a chair and taking a bite of her sandwich "How's it going?"

"Good" he nodded with a slight smirk "Are you going to stop hating me now I'm here to stay?"

"I'm thinking about it" she nodded.

"I hurt you too, didn't I" he said quietly.

"Not as much as her but yes, you did" she sighed "You were like, my brother out there, you were there when Derek wasn't and, I trusted you Sam"

"I'm sorry" he said taking her hand and squeezing it gently "Really"

"I know" Amelia said with a small smile "I guess I can, forgive you, but if you screw up…."

"I'm a dead man, I know" Sam said with a laugh.

"I missed you" she murmured.

"Missed you too" Sam smiled, she nudged him a little before they both started to eat.

_Chapter 12 to follow…._


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Really, really don't like this chapter, I changed the premise of it at least 3 times, so just think of it as a slightly awful filler =/ Just keep with me, there's quite a way to go yet so hopefully I'll get a chapter done that I actually like haha!**

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><p><strong>3 months later.<strong>

"Hey honey" Addison smiled as she let Carson into the apartment, Sam walking in behind him "How was swimming?"

"I'm getting really good now aren't I Daddy?" Carson smiled up at him "I did a whole width all by myself!"

"Well done baby" Addison laughed softly "You'll be swimming up and down that pool before you know it"

"He did great" Sam smiled "His swim teacher is really impressed"

"Ok Carson go and put your swim stuff in the laundry basket for me" Addison smiled, ruffling his slightly damp hair "Say thank you to your Dad for taking you to your lesson"

"Thank you Daddy" Carson smiled, hugging him tightly.

"Anytime buddy" Sam smiled, Carson ran over to the laundry area of the kitchen and started to empty his swim bag into it "He's really great Addie, looks like he's taking after you and your lungs" he laughed "Not mine"

"Well you still played sports, basketball, and we used to go running all the time" she said with a small smile "But he is a swimmer like me" she laughed softly.

"Maybe we could all go together, down to the pool, I know you won't be able to resist me in my swimming trunks" he smirked.

"Sam" Addison laughed, swatting his chest lightly "Don't be stupid"

"I'm just messing" he laughed "But we should do stuff together, all 3 of us, I think Carson would like it"

"Ok" Addison nodded "Swimming sounds good, thank you for taking him today, I had so much paperwork to catch up on…"

"Anytime, you know that" Sam smiled softly.

"Do you want to, come in for dinner? I have enough…"

"No, no I should go, I want to call into the hospital and check on a patient, but thank you, for the offer…"

"Like you said, we should do stuff all together, for Carson" she said with a small smile.

"Are you staying for dinner Daddy?" Carson asked as he walked back over to them.

"No buddy, I've gotta go to the hospital, but we'll have dinner soon ok?"

"Ok" Carson smiled "Bye Daddy"

"Bye Carson" Sam smiled, picking him up and kissing his forehead "Be a good boy for Mommy"

"I will"

"Bye Addie" Sam smiled, kissing her cheek gently.

"Bye Sam" she smiled softly, Carson waved to Sam as he left and then closed the door behind him "Ok Carson, time for dinner" Addison smiled "I bet you're hungry after all that swimming"

"Yep" Carson nodded, Addison laughed and headed into the kitchen.

~x~

"I'm coming, I'm coming" Addison called out tiredly as somebody knocked on her apartment door, she yawned as she opened it.

"Hey sis" Archer Montgomery said with a slight grin.

"It's not even 7am" she yawned "What are you doing here? You should call first and, what the hell have you done this time?" she groaned.

"You have no faith in me Addison" Archer laughed as he entered her apartment "I'm just here to see you and Carson that's all, it's been over 6 months since I saw the little guy"

"But you should still call first" Addison sighed, running a hand tiredly over her face.

"Maybe" he shrugged.

"Mommy, I heard knocking and….Uncle Archer!" Carson grinned, going from sleepy to wide-awake in a second.

"There he is" Archer smiled, scooping Carson up and tickling him "Look how big you are now"

"Mommy says I'm growing too fast" Carson laughed "Why are you here? It's not my birthday for months yet"

"I just wanted to see you champ" Archer smiled "You've missed me right?"

"Uh-huh" Carson nodded "And guess what? I have a Daddy too now"

Addison winced a little to herself.

"A what?" Archer said with a raised eyebrow.

"A Daddy" Carson smiled "My _real_ Daddy, he came here months and months ago cuz my big sister Maya had a poorly head and Uncle Derek had to do an operation and Mommy told me he was my Daddy and we was just gonna visit him at the beach but, he moved here instead! It's so great! I see him _all__the__time_ and we do lots of stuff together and I speak to my big sister Maya on the phone all the time too, she's really cool"

"Wait so, so Sam is here?" Archer stuttered "Sam Bennett is in Seattle? When Addison? When did this all happen?"

"Just after the new year" Addison sighed "He moved here 3 months ago, I was going to tell you but, I knew you'd get mad and that isn't fair"

"Isn't fair?" Archer exclaimed, putting Carson to his feet "Addison he broke your heart! Me breaking his legs is a fair trade off I think"

"Archer" Addison glared, looking from him to Carson whose bottom lip was quivering "Honey come here, don't get upset" she picked Carson up and held him closely, his head burying into her neck "Your Uncle Archer didn't mean to be so horrible did you Archer?"

"No, no I'm, I'm sorry buddy" Archer sighed "I didn't mean to upset you"

"My Daddy fixes broken hearts" Carson mumbled "He doesn't break them, he doesn't, Daddy and Mommy just got into a fight before I was born but it's ok now, they're friends now cuz of me"

"Yes we are baby" Addison said softly, rubbing his back softly "We are, don't you worry, why don't you go to your room and choose something to wear today, I'll be there in a minute"

"Ok" Carson mumbled, Addison put him on his feet and he went to his room.

"I'm sorry Addie" Archer sighed "I'm sorry that I said that in front of Carson but I'm not sorry for saying it, I still want to break his legs, he hurt you…"

"You've hurt me plenty of times, and so has the Captain, but I've forgiven you and I've let you into my son's life, I let that happen because you are my family and so is Sam, Sam is my family because he gave me Carson, he might have hurt me but he gave me Carson too, and he has been a great father to him since all of this happened, we're finally moving on Archer"

"And there's nothing there? He's not trying anything stupid…"

"We're friends" Addison smiled "For Carson, we're friends, and it's going great, Carson really loves him"

"I can see that" Archer sighed "You've got to at least give me the chance to yell at him a little"

"No" Addison smirked "But you are going to have to talk to him because Derek and Meredith are having a big barbeque this afternoon while Seattle has a little sun, I'm sure they won't mind you being there, if you behave Archer"

"Fine" he mumbled.

"I'm going to go and help Carson now, you can make us breakfast ok? I want coffee, he'll have juice, and there's eggs and bacon in the refrigerator"

"Yes Ma'am" Archer said, giving her a salute, Addison patted his shoulder gently as she passed him and went into Carson's room, finding him putting on his t-shirt.

"Hi honey" she smiled softly, she perched on the edge of his bed and patted her knee gently, he walked over to her and she pulled him up onto her lap "Can I have a smile?" she asked, tickling his stomach a little, Carson laughed a little and hugged her tightly "Carson your Uncle Archer, he didn't mean to upset you"

"I know" Carson sighed.

"Sometimes things happen with us grown ups that are confusing for you, but you have to know that we all love you so so much"

"I know Mommy" he smiled up at her "But did, did Daddy really make you sad?"

"Me and your Dad, we loved each other a lot, we really did, and yes, he did upset me but, he didn't mean to do it, you know your Daddy would never upset anyone on purpose don't you?"

"Yeah, I know"

"Like you said to Uncle Archer, me and your Dad are friends now because of you, and that won't change honey, we'll always be friends for you, we might not all be together all the time like some other families but we are a family, just a special kind"

"Yeah" Carson smiled "And I get two bedrooms and two sets of toys and stuff"

"There's that too" Addison laughed "So you're ok?"

"Yep" Carson beamed "I love you Mommy"

"I love you too baby boy" Addison whispered, kissing against his hair gently.

~x~

Sam parked his car on the large driveway in front of Derek and Meredith's house in the woods and smiled to himself as he heard talking and laughter from his friends and their children, looking to the large area of grass where they sat around a large table watching the kids play and Derek and Mark barbecue food on the huge barbeque Derek had insisted on buying, as he walked closer Carson ran straight for him and into his legs.

"Hi champ" he laughed "You having fun?"

"Uh-huh" Carson smiled "Daddy my Uncle Archer is here too"

"What?" Sam frowned.

"Hello Sam" Archer said firmly, Sam looked up to see him stood a little further away.

"Archer, hi" Sam stuttered.

"It's ok Daddy, Uncle Archer promised me he wouldn't hurt you" Carson said, his voice only showing a little fear, his arms wrapping around Sam's legs.

"Uh…" Sam started "Carson buddy go and play with Zo and Sofia ok? Me and your Uncle Archer are going to talk, you go and have fun"

"Uncle Archer you promised me" Carson pouted up at him.

"Little man I would never do anything to upset you ok?" Archer said softly as he crouched down "I'm sorry for upsetting you this morning, do you forgive me? I'm still your favourite Uncle right?"

"Right" Carson laughed "I'm gonna go and play now"

"Go on" Archer smiled, pushing him gently, Carson ran back over to where everyone else was, Addison looked over at them both worriedly.

"I know you hate me" Sam started "And I get that, I'd hate me too, I did hate me for a long time, but me and Addison, we're finally in a place where we can be friends, where we can show Carson a united front, you probably want to hurt me, punch me in the face or, something…"

"Break your legs actually"

"Right, break my legs" Sam nodded "And you can go ahead and do that, or you can pretend to like me just a little, just when you visit, for Carson, not for me or for Addie, but for him"

"I will try my best" Archer sighed, crossing his arms "I didn't think you were that guy, I didn't think you were like me, a cheater, and you're probably not really, but if you dare to break my sisters heart again, when she lets you back in, which she will, if you dare…"

"I won't hurt her, or Carson, ever again" Sam sighed "And we're not, that will never happen, me and her, she doesn't want that"

"There's a betting pool Sam" Archer said dryly "We all know it's going to happen"

"It won't" Sam said quietly "And please, don't say that to Addison, she'd tear your head off, really"

"I'm not that stupid" Archer smirked.

"So we can be, civil then?"

"Sure" Archer sighed.

"Hey" Addison said tentatively as she approached them "Is everything ok over here?"

"Everything's fine" Archer said, turning to her with a smile "Right Sam?"

"Right" Sam nodded.

"I'll just, go and help with the barbecue" Archer said, backing away slowly.

"I should have called, sorry" Addison sighed "I didn't know he was coming until he turned up on my doorstep this morning"

"Don't worry, we're fine, we're going to be civil which is, good right?"

"Yeah" she sighed "I never thought I'd have to explain to Carson or rather, explain away the reason why his Uncle wants to break his fathers legs"

"Do you need me to talk to him?" Sam asked quietly.

"No, no I dealt with it, Carson's good, he was a little upset this morning but he's good now, his favourite Aunty Amelia has been slipping him a ton of sugar when she thinks I'm not looking" she smirked.

"That's what favourite Aunties are for" Sam laughed, Addison rolled her eyes a little before they re-joined the group.

_Chapter 13 to follow…._


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry this is a day late, had an awful evening yesterday and couldn't bring myself to even turn on my laptop, and for people who know me well that is a big deal lol :P Hope you enjoy this chapter, reviews would cheer me up pretty please! I know there are a lot more readers out there than reviewers so please please comment! Got an Addisam christmas oneshot to post later in the week too! Love Kelly xxx**

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><p><strong>1 month later.<strong>

"Hi Daddy" Carson smiled as Sam opened his apartment door.

"Hey buddy" Sam smiled, ruffling his hair a little "You had a good day?"

"Yep" he nodded "I need to pee"

"Well come on in then" Sam laughed; Carson rushed inside and ran towards the bathroom "So, any plans tonight?" he asked Addison.

"Yeah uh, I've got a date" she nodded "Callie set me up with someone"

"Oh" Sam said with surprise "I didn't know you were, dating"

"I haven't been in a while" she shrugged lightly "But I have no reason not too, Callie said this guy is great so…"

"Well, well have a good time then" Sam stuttered.

"I will" Addison smiled.

"I'll call you tomorrow, before I bring Carson home, I said I'd take him to the park"

"Ok, well I'll speak to you tomorrow then"

"I'll see you tomorrow Mommy" Carson smiled as he rushed towards her, hugging her tightly "Love you"

"I love you too sweetheart, be a good boy for your Dad ok?" she said, kissing the top of his head.

"I promise" Carson smiled.

"Have a good night" Sam said quietly "Bye"

"Bye" Addison said quietly, she waved a little at Carson before walking down the hall, Sam stepped back into his apartment and closed the door, letting out a heavy sigh.

"Are you ok Dad?" Carson asked, looking up at him with wide eyes.

"Sure I am buddy boy, now do you want pizza or pasta for dinner?"

"Pizza!"

"I thought as much" Sam laughed, heading over to his kitchen.

~x~

"Higher Dad, higher!" Carson said loudly as Sam pushed him on the swings in the park the next day, Sam laughed and pulled the swing back as far as he could before letting go, Carson laughed as the wind rushed through his hair "Daddy Aunt Amelia's here!" he said as he spotted Amelia walking towards them, Sam slowed down the swing and Carson jumped off, running towards her, Amelia scooped him up and swung him around a little before putting him back on his feet.

"Hey little man" she smiled "Your Dad said you were coming here so I stopped by to say hey, is that cool?"

"Sure" Carson smiled up at her "Look, watch me on the jungle gym" he said happily, rushing off towards the frame, Amelia smiled and walked over to Sam.

"I just thought I'd come and say hello" she shrugged.

"I'm fine" Sam said simply.

"Addison went on a date last night, you're not fine, you're still in love with her"

"I'm not"

"Sam" Amelia smirked "I knew when you loved her before and I know it now, and I really didn't want to be the one to say this to you again but, you should fight for her Sam"

"She's made it very clear that we're only friends for Carson and I respect that, me and her, we're not meant to be together" he sighed "It's been years Amelia, maybe if we were still in LA, if I hadn't have, messed up, we'd still be together, but that's just a what if"

"Well if you're not going to fight for her, if you don't want her, why haven't you dated anyone since she left?"

"How do you know that?" he frowned.

"You just told me" she laughed, Sam let out a slight laugh and shook his head "Last night was her first date since you, she's had offers, plenty of them, she always said she was saying no because of Carson and I believed her for the first couple of years but, it's about you Sam, it's always been about you"

"She went on a date last night didn't she?"

"Because she's as in denial as you" Amelia laughed "Sam, look me in the eye and tell me you don't love her"

"Of course I love her" he breathed out "But I can't, I can't just tell her that, I can't ruin what we have, I finally feel like a real Dad to Carson…"

"Sam she wouldn't do anything to stop that" she said softly "She wouldn't do that, not this time, so if that's what's stopping you…."

"You never give up do you?" Sam laughed softly.

"Never Sam, never" she smirked.

~x~

"Hey" Addison smiled as she let Sam and Carson into her apartment.

"Hi Mommy" Carson smiled, hugging her tightly.

"Hi sweetheart, did you have a good time with your Dad?"

"We went to the park, Aunt Amelia came to see us there too" he smiled.

"Well that was nice of her" Addison smiled softly "Go and wash your hands, dinner's almost ready"

"Ok" he smiled "Bye Dad" he said, hugging Sam.

"Bye little man, I'll see you soon"

"See you soon" Carson smiled before heading off to the bathroom to wash his hands.

"So, how was your date?" Sam asked awkwardly.

"Ok" Addison nodded "He seems nice"

"Are you going to see him again?"

"Maybe" she said with a slight shrug "I'll see you at work Sam"

Sam nodded just slightly, he went to leave but turned back, opening his mouth a little to say something.

"No" Addison said, cutting him off "Before you say what I think you're going to say, don't, because then I'll have to yell at you and I won't do that with Carson down the hall"

"Addison" he sighed "You don't even know what I was going to say"

"Well it wasn't 'I hope you're happy with him' was it Sam?"

"Of course it wasn't" he said firmly "I, I just wanted to talk about us…"

"There is no us" Addison said with a firm whisper "Now please, just go"

"Fine" Sam said with a breath "Fine, I'll go" he let out a heavy sigh and walked quickly away from the apartment.

~x~

"Hey" Sam said quietly as Addison walked into the doctors lounge the next day.

"Hi" she mumbled, avoiding his eye as she opened the small refrigerator and took out a bottle of water.

"So this is how it's going to be now?" he said with a sharp laugh "You're going to be short with me? You didn't even let me talk Addison so why the hell are you mad at me?"

"Because you have no right!" she exclaimed "You have no right to get upset or pissed off because I went on a date! We've been done for years because you slept with my best friend, you gave up on us, you did this to us! You have no right!"

"You were the one who left" Sam said loudly "You just ran! I know I messed up, I know I hurt you, but you could have stayed and we could have _tried_ and I wouldn't have missed out on 4 years of my son's life, you didn't have to run!"

"How could I look at you in the eye Sam?" she asked shakily "How could I look at, at the man I loved, knowing he didn't love me enough to be faithful to me, how could I do that? You say you loved me? That you wanted me to stay? That we should have tried? But you were the one who ended us. I may have left but you ended us the minute you even thought of touching her. You broke my heart" she said tearfully "Do you not get that?"

"And you broke mine right back, the minute you decided to keep Carson from me, it's always been all about you Addison, always, you never think of anyone but yourself" he spat "You had no right to keep my son from me, you had no right to make that decision, you're just the selfish spoilt little rich girl you always were"

"Screw you" Addison said with a sob "How dare you, how dare you even say that to me?..."

"Addison" Sam started with a whisper.

"No"

"Addison I didn't, I didn't mean that…."

"Somehow I don't believe you" she said hoarsely before storming out, slamming the door firmly behind her.

~x~

"Morning" Arizona smiled as Addison walked into the NICU.

"Hey" Addison sniffled.

"What's wrong Addie? What happened?" Arizona asked instantly, seeing her puffy eyes "Come on it's just us and the babies, tell me"

"I just had a fight with Sam" she sighed "He got upset about my date last night, so I yelled at him, I told him he didn't have the right to be upset, and then he yelled back and, he said, he brought up me keeping Carson from me and said that, that I only think about myself, I'm just the selfish spoilt little rich girl I always was, that's what he said, I always thought, I always thought he knew that I was never that girl, I thought he knew that" Addison said tearfully.

"Oh honey" Arizona sighed "I'm sure he does know that, you were just fighting, people say stupid things in a fight"

"I know" Addison sniffled "I just, I'm sick and tired of avoiding him, I know I see him all the time but, I avoid talking to him about anything other than work and Carson and I shouldn't, because then it all builds up and we fight like this…"

"Well then, you need to tell him how you feel" Arizona said softly "Truthfully, tell him what's going on in your head"

"When was the last time I told anyone the truth about that?" Addison laughed quietly.

"Never, you bottle everything up until you burst, but it's time to stop, now go and take a time out in your office, get all of your frustrations out, go"

"You're giving me a time out?" Addison smirked.

"I am indeed Dr Montgomery" Arizona laughed, Addison swatted her lightly on the arm with the folder in her hands and headed out of the NICU and towards her office.

~x~

Sam let out a sigh as he stood outside of Addison's office before knocking on the door.

"Come in" he heard her call out, he slowly opened the door and she let out a heavy sigh.

"If you're here to apologise, don't, I don't want your apologies" she sighed.

"You're not selfish" he said quietly as he closed the door behind him, walking closer to her "You're not, you were protecting Carson and I understand that, I was just angry and I said something stupid, I'm so sorry"

"When I found out I was pregnant, after I was finally over the shock, I stopped crying over you" she said quietly "I stopped myself from feeling heartbroken because at least you had given me the one thing I didn't think I'd ever have, a baby, and when I looked into his eyes I felt, complete, I tried to be over you, I really did, and for a long time I was, but now you're here and I feel it all again, the heartbreak, I see you and I feel that heartbreak again, I feel the hurt, and if you really loved me, then you'd just leave me be"

"But don't you get it? Addison I can't do that, I can't stop myself from loving you, from wanting you to be happy, and I think we can be happy together, all 3 of us, we can be a family, don't you want that?"

"I did" she sniffled "A long time ago I did"

"Then let me prove to you that I can be the partner and father you wanted me to be, let me take you on a date, anywhere you want, we can make it like old times, without the beach" he said with a soft laugh, stroking a tear away from her cheek "We'll talk about, about everything, but not about the past, we'll talk about our future and I will prove to you I can be the right guy for you, just give me that chance"

"You can't keep bringing up the fact that I kept Carson from you" she said quietly "I know that was wrong, I know that, but everytime we have a disagreement, you can't bring that up, it's not fair, I'll, I'll try not to, bring up what happened in LA"

"Ok" he said softly.

"And I want you to surprise me, for this date"

"So you, you'll come on the date?" he smiled "You'll let me take you out?"

"If I can get a sitter for Carson…."

"You won't regret this Addie, I swear you won't" Sam smiled, squeezing her hands "I never, ever want to be the reason you cry again, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry"

"I know" Addison said gently.

"I love you" he whispered.

"I know" Addison whispered back "You stupid asshole" she mumbled, Sam laughed softly and wrapped his arms around her, she let out a sigh and pressed her head against his shoulder.

_Chapter 14 to follow…._


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Promised a few people a double update for Christmas so here it is :) **

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><p>"Hi" Addison said quietly as she opened her apartment door to Sam.<p>

"Hey" he smiled "For you" he said holding out a bunch of flowers "You look beautiful"

"Thanks" she said with a small smile "Can you wait while I put these in water?"

"Sure" he nodded, he walked into the apartment and shut the door while Addison moved into the kitchen, she picked out a vase and they stayed silent while she arranged the flowers, when she was done she put them in the middle of the dining area table.

"Ok, I'm ready" Addison said picking up her bag "Now where exactly are we going? Is this outfit ok? You said casual…"

"It's perfect, and where we're going is a surprise" Sam said with a slight laugh as they left the apartment "And don't pout" he smirked as he walked ahead of her.

"I'm not pouting!"

"Yes, you are" he chuckled, Addison grumbled to herself and followed him into the elevator "Trust me Addie"

"Ok" she nodded reluctantly, Sam only smiled at her.

~x~

"Are we, are we at a park?" Addison asked as Sam pulled up his car.

"Yep" he nodded, he climbed out of the car and opened the trunk, he took out a basket and moved to her side of the car, opening the door "Are you coming?"

"Uh, yeah, sure" she stuttered, she climbed out of the car and Sam linked their fingers together, he locked the car and then led Addison through the small park, stopping at an empty bench, he sat down and put the basket next to him as Addison sat on his other side.

"Don't you think that view is great" he smiled, looking out at the Seattle skyline, the sun halfway set.

"It's beautiful" Addison smiled "I've lived in Seattle for, a long time now, and I've never really, thought of it as a beautiful place, it's just the place I ran to, y'know?"

"And now it's home" Sam smiled gently.

"And now it's home" Addison nodded.

"So, I brought wine" Sam said opening up the basket "Your favourite" he passed her a glass and poured some out for her, he poured himself a smaller glass and put the bottle down on the bench "I brought us dessert, chocolate cake with raspberries on top…"

"Sam" she said with a slight laugh.

"And we have a pizza heading our way in about 10 minutes"

"A pizza?"

"Don't pretend you wanted some fancy meal in some busy restaurant, I know you Addie"

"Yeah, I guess you do" she said with a small smile, Sam brought his hand to her face and gently stroked her cheek before kissing her lips softly, Addison let him kiss her and let her head rest on his shoulder as they pulled apart, watching the sunset until their pizza arrived.

~x~

"Tell me something" Sam said quietly as they sat eating their dessert.

"What?" Addison said before taking another bite of her cake.

"Tell me something about Carson, something I don't know yet"

"Ok" she nodded with a small smile "God um, oh I know, when he was about 2 and a half maybe, we were in the car and he asked me if he could drive next time, I replied, but you can't drive, he was adamant that he could, I asked him if he could drive without crashing and he said 'maybe it's best if I don't drive the car'" she laughed.

"That's cute" Sam laughed lightly.

"I bought him one of those kids steering wheels for the back of the car after that, he loved that thing, he wanted to be a racing driver back then, but now it's all about spacemen, it'll be something else in a couple of months"

"Probably" Sam chuckled lightly "He's, he's amazing, isn't he?"

"He is" Addison smiled "I'm so proud of him, he's so smart, and he's, he's so much like you, even before, he was always so much like you, he knows when I need a hug" she laughed quietly "I'd had a really bad day at the hospital, awful, 2 of the NICU babies passed away, I almost lost another patient, I just felt like crap, I was sitting on the sofa while he played with his toys and he just looked up at me, climbed up onto the sofa next to me and hugged me, he's caring just like you"

"He gets that from you too" Sam said softly.

"I'm glad you're here, do you know that?" Addison said quietly "I know I don't show it, I know I've never let you into my life and only Carson's, but I am really glad you're here, I missed you, not just us, I missed you, my friend"

"I'm here now" he said, linking their fingers together and bringing them up to his lips "I'm not going to let you down again, I'll be that guy"

"That guy huh?" Addison laughed.

"The guy who brings you soup when you're sick, the chocolate cake with raspberries on top guy"

"It is good cake" Addison said with a smile as she took a bite of the cake, Sam laughed and kissed her cheek gently.

~x~

"Tonight has been, great Sam" Addison said with a small smile as he walked her to her front door "Thank you"

"Do you think, you wanna do it again?" he asked quietly.

"Sam, we can't just, it's not going to be like before"

"I know that, I don't want it to be like before, we messed it up before, but this time we won't, I know it"

"Why do you know it? How do you know that Sam?" she sighed.

"Because, all that stuff from before, it's done, it's over, this is a new beginning for us, for our _family_" Sam smiled, bringing his hand up to rest on her shoulder, moving up gently to the back of her neck "I'm not expecting anything from you, I know you're not going to love me like you did before, but I'm asking you to try, just _try_ to trust me again, because we can be something, so if you want to take the chance, go on another date with me"

"Ok" Addison sighed, biting her bottom lip a little.

"I'm sorry" he whispered softly "For everything, for what I did back then, for what I said to you last week…."

"You already apologised for that Sam" she said quietly "I know you didn't mean it"

"I'm still sorry, I don't want you to ever think that I, I think any of that about you, you're not selfish, you never have been and I…."

"Sam, shut up" Addison said with a slight laugh, pulling him closer and kissing him.

"We're going to do this Addie" he whispered against her mouth before kissing her again "Trust me"

"I can try" she said with a small shrug, she stepped back into her apartment and closed the door quietly.

_Chapter 15 to follow…._


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Although some people would beg to differ (yes you Jackie!) I think I have been more than generous with updates this past week :P After this chapter I will be back to posting every Monday afternoon! Reviews would be lovely :) xxx**

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><p><strong>1 month later.<strong>

"Hey" Sam smiled as Addison let him into her apartment "Did I miss bedtime?"

"No Daddy I'm right here!" Carson beamed, waving from where he sat on the sofa "Are you tucking me in tonight?"

"I am buddy, what story do you want tonight?"

"Um, I want to read the book about space" Carson smiled.

"Ok" Sam smiled "Well say goodnight to your Mom"

Carson stood up on the sofa and Addison lifted him over the back, his small legs wrapping around her "Goodnight my sweetheart" she smiled, kissing him "Have lots of nice dreams"

"I will" Carson smiled "Night Mommy" he hugged her tightly before she put him on his feet, he took Sam's hand and pulled him into his bedroom, Addison set about finishing the dinner she was cooking for her and Sam with a smile on her face.

~x~

"Hey" Sam smiled as he walked out of Carson's bedroom, quietly closing the doors "He's pretty much asleep, drifted off when I was reading about planets"

"Good" Addison smiled "This spaghetti's almost done"

"Good" Sam smiled, he came up behind her at the kitchen counter where she was stirring the spaghetti sauce and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her shoulder gently "I'm so glad to be here" he sighed.

"Tough day?"

"For everyone, a lot of unsuccessful surgeries today, we've gone through a lot of Juju"

"I'm sorry" Addison said softly, turning in his arms and kissing him.

"I'm feeling better now" he smiled "Being here with you"

"Suck up" she chuckled lightly, kissing him again, Sam smirked a little at her and laughed before giving her another kiss.

~x~

"It's getting late" Sam said quietly as he sat on the sofa with Addison, her head resting on his shoulder as they watched TV, his arm around hers holding her close.

"I know" she sighed.

"I should go"

"Hmm"

"We'll do this again soon" he smiled, kissing the top of her head "I'll cook for you next time"

"I'd like that" Addison smiled "Sam will you, will you stay? You can leave early in the morning…"

"Are you sure?" Sam asked with surprise.

"I just want to be with you" she whispered "I'm ready, I might not be ready to, to say I love you, but I'm ready for us"

Sam cupped her face gently and gave her a passionate kiss "I don't need you to say that you love me, this is enough for right now"

Addison smiled and stood, linking their fingers together and pulling him to her room, their lips coming together again as she closed the door behind them.

~x~

"Wow" Addison panted as she rolled off of Sam's body early the following morning, their bodies sheened in sweat "That was, last night was incredible but that was, wow"

"We've still got it huh?" Sam laughed.

"I never lost it" Addison said with a slight grin, patting Sam's chest lightly.

"Well I don't dispute that" he mumbled, kissing her neck lightly "You are so beautiful, so much more beautiful than ever, I love you"

"Sam" Addison sighed.

"I know you can't say it back, but, I'll keep saying it to you" Sam said gently.

"I'm not so beautiful anymore" she mumbled quietly "I've got more wrinkles and stretch marks and if I didn't dye my hair as often as I did it'd be grey…"

"Addie" Sam laughed softly "You are beautiful, sexy, gorgeous, you're everything, knowing our son was inside your body makes it even more beautiful to me"

"Yeah?" Addison said shyly.

"Yeah" Sam whispered, kissing her stomach, Addison laughed a little and pulled him back up to kiss her again.

"Sam" she said quietly "I am, happy with you, you do know that don't you? I know we're still being quiet with Carson but, I am happy, and I think we can, do this"

"I know" he smiled "I should go soon, Carson will be up"

"I know" Addison sighed, cuddling closer to him "Just 5 more minutes"

"5 more minutes" Sam said with a soft smile, he wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled her hair gently as they lay in her bed together.

~x~

"Something's different" Amelia frowned as she sat with Callie and Addison having lunch in the hospital cafeteria.

"What?" Callie asked.

"With her" she said, waving at Addison a little "Something's different"

"Her has a name" Addison laughed "And what do you mean something's different?"

"You had sex" Amelia smirked, leaning back in her chair "You totally had sex"

"Amelia!" Addison said with a blush "Can you not say that in the gossip hub of the hospital please?"

"Well, is she right?" Callie smirked "Did you and Sam really…."

Addison simply smiled, her cheeks still blushing.

"Well it's about time" Amelia laughed "How did you manage that with Carson home?"

"Sam came over for dinner, he put Carson to bed and we had dinner, then we sat on the sofa watching the TV and I just, it felt right, so I took him to my bedroom and, tried to stay extra quiet" Addison laughed quietly "And again this morning before he snuck out"

"How do you feel?" Callie asked "Did it feel like, the right decision?"

"It feels right Cal" Addison said softly "Me and him, it's still tough sometimes but, it feels right, please be happy for me"

"If he makes you happy, of course Addison, but if he messes up again…."

"Rusty scalpels Addie, rusty scalpels" Amelia smirked.

~x~

**1 week later.**

"Hi beautiful" Sam murmured as he came up behind Addison in the conference room where she sat alone looking over some papers, he put his hands on her chair and kissed neck.

"Sam" she said with a slight laugh "People can see us y'know, there are windows on all 4 walls of this room"

"Addie everyone knows we're back together" he smirked, pulling up the chair next to her "Just one little kiss"

"You're incorrigible sometimes" she laughed, leaning in and kissing him gently "Are you coming over for dinner tonight? It's the first night in a week we've both been off and, well it'd be nice to have a family meal, right?"

"Of course I'll be there" Sam smiled "Do you want me to cook? I think I finish up before you so I could get Carson and go to the store…"

"Ok" she nodded "Um, here" she said pulling her keys from her pocket "You should, get a copy of them"

"Yeah?"

"Well it just makes sense" she shrugged "It's not a big deal"

"Ok" he smiled, pulling her in for another kiss "I've got to go and check on some patients, so I'll see you later"

"See you later" Addison smiled, she laughed a little as he kissed her again and then left, Sam put Addison's keys in his pocket as he walked down the hall, jumping as he felt someone pull him backwards into a supply closet.

"You don't get to mess it up this time" Mark said simply as he shoved him back against the wall, Sam blinked a little and saw Mark, Derek and Alex all stood in front of him "Because this time, this time you've got us 3 ready to kick your sorry ass, you won't just get a smack in the mouth from that quack dude"

"We've all hurt Addison in the past" Alex added "We know that, but none of us hurt her like you did, and none of us had a kid with her who is, amazing, he's amazing and I know you know that, and if you hurt his Mom you hurt him, another reason for us to hurt you"

"I know you love her" Derek sighed "I know that, but you loved her before and you broke her heart, she deserves more, and we're going to trust you to give her more, if you can promise us you can do that"

"I promise" Sam nodded "I've already promised her, and I thought you guys, knew that" he said tentatively.

"She just keyed you dude" Alex smirked.

"Yeah, so she's damn serious about this, that means we have to do this, it's our duty as her guy friends" Mark said, folding his arms.

"The key doesn't really mean anything…" Sam started.

"Oh buddy, the key means _everything_" Derek said with a small smirk, patting Sam's shoulder.

~x~

"Hey" Addison smiled as she walked into her apartment.

"Hi Mom" Carson smiled.

"Hi sweetie, did you have a good day?"

"I did a painting of space, it's still drying but I can bring it home tomorrow when it's dry"

"Well I can't wait to see it honey" Addison smiled.

"Coffee, for you" Sam smiled as he approached her, putting the mug into her hand.

"Thank you" she smiled, her eyes locking on his, he smirked at her and she blushed a little.

"Y'know, your 3 bodyguards had a few words with me today" he said with a whisper.

"What?" she frowned.

"Derek, Mark and Karev, they gave me a protective big brother speech Archer would be proud of, they saw you give me your keys, apparently that warrants the speech, because you mean business now, are they right?"

"I always mean business Sam, always" Addison laughed softly.

_Chapter 16 to follow…_


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: HAPPY NEW YEAR! I have got a lot going on in 2012, all good I hope :P And I hope you all have a lot of good things going on too! Please don't hesitate to leave me a review!**

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><p><strong>2 weeks later.<strong>

"So, when are you going to tell Carson about you and Sam?" Bailey asked as she sat in the conference room with Addison going over some paperwork and eating lunch.

"I'm sorry, did you just ask me something about my personal life?" Addison smirked.

"Oh sshh" Bailey said, swatting her arm "I ask, most of the time you tell me first but I do ask, now are you going to tell him yet or not?"

"Soon" Addison said with a small smile "I don't want to rush it"

"It's been over 2 months now" Bailey pointed out "You're sleeping with the man, he's sneaking in and out of your apartment, Carson isn't stupid Addison, he'll pick up on it eventually"

"I know" Addison sighed "And me and Sam are good I just, I don't want us to tell him to have things go wrong…"

"You need to tell him Addison, you and Sam will never have a real relationship without complete honesty"

"I know, I know that, I want to tell him, I will tell him, soon"

"Soon my ass" Bailey muttered to herself.

~x~

"Mom" Carson said quietly as he sat with Addison on the sofa watching cartoons.

"Yeah?"

"Is Daddy your boyfriend now?"

"What?" Addison frowned "What would make you say that?"

"He kissed you, when you was saying goodbye yesterday, I was coming to get some juice cuz I was thirsty and he kissed you at the door, he said that he loves you, so, that means he's your boyfriend doesn't it?"

"Yeah honey, yeah it does" Addison said with a soft sigh "We were going to tell you soon"

"Is Daddy going to come and live with us?"

"No, he's not, but it does mean that we're going to be spending more time together, as a family, we'll be a family now"

"I knew it" Carson sighed happily "I knew you loved him Mommy, I knew it, I knew you'd stop being in a fight"

"Oh honey, we stopped being in a fight a long time ago, for you, our little man" Addison smiled softly, kissing against his hair "I love you sweetheart"

"I love you too Mom" he smiled up at her "Daddy makes you happy doesn't he, I can tell, you smile more now"

"I do?" Addison laughed softly "Did I not smile before?"

"Yeah! All the time, especially with me" Carson smiled proudly "But sometimes you'd get sad, and Daddy makes you smile now, doesn't he?"

"He does baby" Addison said softly "You are so grown up, do you know that? Less than 2 months and you'll be 5" she smiled, tickling him, Carson laughed and squirmed in her arms.

"So that means less than 1 month and you'll be even more old" he laughed.

"Hey" Addison pouted before tickling him more.

"Sorry Mommy" Carson laughed loudly.

~x~

"Hey champ" Sam smiled as he opened the door to his apartment the next morning.

"Hi Daddy" Carson smiled "You can kiss Mommy in front of my now cuz I already guessed you're her boyfriend, but not too much, cuz kissing is gross ok?"

"Uh…" Sam started, slightly stunned.

"I was going to call but you were in surgery" Addison said with a quiet laugh "Someone saw you kissing me goodbye the other night"

"Oh" Sam said with surprise "And is that, ok Carson?" he asked tentatively "You don't mind?"

"Well I don't need to see you kissing _all the time_, but, we get to be a family now don't we" Carson beamed "So we'll do things together more, it's going to be great"

"It is buddy" Sam said softly "And y'know, I have something for your Mom"

"You do?" Addison asked curiously, Sam walked over to the kitchen and took something out of the drawer, passing it over to Addison.

"It's a key" she smiled, looking at the key in her hand, the key ring attached a picture of Sam and Carson both smiling.

"Well I have one for your place so, it makes sense for you to have one for mine" he smiled.

"Thank you" she smiled "And I love this picture, I don't, I don't have any of the both of you"

"It's no problem" Sam smiled.

"I have to get going" Addison sighed "I've got a meeting with Amelia and then I need to see a patient, I'll call you tonight"

"Ok" he nodded.

"Bye sweetheart, I'll see you tomorrow" Addison smiled, kissing the top of Carson's head.

"Bye Mommy" Carson smiled.

Sam re-opened the door to his apartment and Addison stepped outside.

"So, this is it" Sam breathed out "Everyone knows now"

"Everyone knows now" Addison smiled softly, she leaned in and kissed him gently "I think we're going to survive it, don't you?" she said with a slight laugh.

"I know it" he laughed "Have a good day, save lots of lives"

"I'll try" Addison laughed, she smiled and hugged him tightly before leaving, turning back around briefly to wave at Sam, laughing as she caught him staring at her ass.

~x~

"Hey" Addison smiled as she walked into the conference room where Amelia was waiting for her.

"Well aren't you happy this morning" Amelia smirked.

"I am" Addison smiled as she took a seat "It turns out Carson had already discovered for himself that me and Sam are together and he was, pretty happy about it"

"Well I could've told you that, where is the kid?"

"I just dropped him off with Sam, and he gave me a key to his place, look how cute this picture is" she smiled, showing her the key ring.

"Wow, Carson looks more and more like him every day"

"I know" Addison sighed happily.

"God look at you" Amelia laughed "You're all, in love, it's pretty gross Addie"

"I'm not in love"

"You are totally in love"

"Shut up"

_Chapter 17 to follow…._


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: So it may get a little fluffier from now on. Sorry :P**

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><p><strong>2 weeks later.<strong>

"What's all this?" Addison asked with a tired smile as she walked out of her bedroom sleepily to find Carson clumsily setting the table and Sam stood in the kitchen cooking.

"Happy Birthday!" Carson beamed.

"Well thank you sweetheart" she said with a slight laugh.

"I've made us pancakes, plain and chocolate chip" Sam smiled "There's fruit and toast on the table and fresh orange juice and coffee in the pot, when we're finished with breakfast we've got presents for you to open and then Callie will be here to pick you up, you're going for a spa day, and then tonight, me and you are going to a hotel for dinner, and we're going to stay the night"

"I'm having a sleepover with Sofia" Carson smiled.

"Sam this is, this is all too much" Addison said with a soft laugh "You didn't have to do all this for me"

"Of course I did" he smiled, he put the pancakes onto a plate and moved over to her, kissing her gently "It's your birthday and I'm going to treat you like a Princess all day"

"A Princess huh?" she laughed.

"Yeah" he grinned, kissing her again "Now sit down and enjoy breakfast"

"Ok" Addison smiled.

"Mommy I made you a card" Carson said, handing it to her as she sat down.

"Oh honey this is beautiful" Addison smiled, the front of the card covered in different types of material messily glued on in the shapes of flowers, on the inside Carson had misspelled the message but perfectly written his name "Your writing is getting so good now Carson, Cristina has done a great job teaching you"

"It's a shame his birthday falls a little too late for kindergarten, he'd do so well" Sam sighed as he sat down, serving Carson some pancakes.

"Daycare are really encouraging him now, they've been getting him some workbooks to help with his reading and writing having they Carson?"

"Uh-huh" Carson nodded "Cuz I really love to learn Mommy"

"I know you do baby and I will remind you of that in 10 years time when you should be studying but you're not" Addison laughed.

"I'll always do my work Mommy!"

"Famous last words" Sam smirked, Carson giggled and took a bite of his pancakes.

"Happy Birthday baby" Sam smiled, squeezing Addison's hand gently.

"Thank you" she smiled, kissing his cheek.

~x~

"I don't think I have felt this relaxed in years" Addison breathed out as she sank into a Jacuzzi opposite Callie "That massage was, incredible"

"Yeah" Callie breathed out "I love work, I love Sofia, but being here and being able to just, relax, well I didn't realize how much I missed it" she laughed "I owe Sam big time for this"

"I can't believe he did all this for me" Addison said with a small smile "The breakfast and the spa and the hotel, and presents on top of that…"

"You are very lucky" Callie smiled "He really loves you Addie, all he does is try to make you happy"

"You've changed your tune" Addison said with a laugh "You were the most reluctant for me to be with him again"

"Because I saw how hurt you were before, but what I didn't see, was him and you together, Amelia always insisted that he was a good guy and that he loved you and what he did was so out of character for him, and I didn't want to believe it, but seeing you together now, seeing the way he looks at you, I know you're meant to be together, and you really need to just tell him that you love him"

"I can't" Addison sighed "I can't say it"

"You can honey" Callie said softly "You love him, you never stopped, telling him that isn't going to change anything"

"I know"

"Tonight you're going to an amazing hotel, just you and him, it'll be completely romantic and you can have as much sex as you want without worrying about any innocent ears hearing" Callie laughed, Addison rolled her eyes a little "So when the moment is there, tell him, and if it all ends in tears you can blame me ok? But I highly doubt it will"

"Ok" Addison sighed "I, I'm happy Cal"

"I know sweetie" Callie smiled "I know"

~x~

"Thank you" Addison said quietly as she lay facing Sam in their hotel room bed that night, a sheet draped across naked bodies that were almost touching, Sam's hand on the small of Addison's back.

"What for?" he asked.

"Today" she smiled "Everything, it's just been, amazing"

"I just wanted you to have a day that was all about you" Sam smiled "I'm glad you've enjoyed yourself, I was scared you'd kill me for organizing everything without asking…"

"It has been perfect" she whispered, kissing him gently "I know I haven't been the easiest of people to love since you moved here, I know I've, I've still pushed you away at times but, Sam I'm ready now, for everything, I'm so happy with you and with Carson and I, I should have said it a long time ago, I, I love you Sam, I never really stopped"

"Oh Addie" Sam whispered, stroking her cheek gently "I love you too, so much, having you back in my life, god this will sound so cheesy but, it completes me" he laughed quietly "I won't let you down again, I promise, this is it, me, you and Carson, this is it"

"I know" Addison smiled, wrapping her arms around him and kissing his neck "I think it's time I said thank you properly for today" she whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Mmhmm" she nodded, grinning up at him, Sam raised an eyebrow and smirked before Addison disappeared under the covers.

~x~

"I don't want to leave" Addison mumbled as she cuddled into Sam's chest the next morning "Can't we stay a little longer?"

"We could, but I think Carson would wonder where his parents were" Sam laughed softly "We can do this again, for my birthday maybe"

"Hmm, we could" Addison smiled "It's nice to have alone time"

"It certainly is" Sam murmured, caressing her body gently "I promise we'll have alone time again"

"Good" she grinned "I guess we should get up and get dressed"

"We've got time for a nice warm shower" Sam smiled "I'll get you all soapy"

"Ok" Addison laughed "Oh, hang on" she sighed, reaching out to her ringing cell "Hello? Oh, ok, no Cal that's fine…no you weren't interrupting…it's ok Callie, go, I'll see you later….ok, bye" she hung up the phone and lay back on the bed.

"What is it?" Sam asked.

"Callie and Arizona have both been called in, Meredith was just finishing up at the hospital so she's taken Carson and Sofia back with her, that means we're probably safe for a little bit longer…."

Sam smirked and stood up, grabbing Addison's hand and pulling her with him, both of them walking naked into the bathroom.

~x~

"Hello? Anyone home?" Addison called out as she walked into the Shepherd house.

"In the kitchen" Meredith called back "Hey" she smiled as Addison and Sam walked in.

"Hey" Addison smiled "Where are the kids?"

"In the playroom watching a movie, I wasn't allowed to stay" Meredith smirked "Zola hasn't even reached double figures and she already thinks I'm uncool, somehow that's unfair"

"She's a Daddy's girl" Derek smirked proudly as he walked into the room.

"True" Meredith laughed.

"So, how was your birthday?" Derek asked, giving Addison a kiss on the cheek.

"It was amazing" she smiled "This one treated me very well" she said, patting Sam's chest lightly.

"Anything for you" he smiled, kissing her gently.

"Well aren't you two in a good mood" Derek smirked.

"They've been having dirty sex for the past 12 hours, of course they are" Meredith laughed.

"Meredith" Addison blushed as Sam laughed.

"Mommy! Dad!"

"Hi baby boy" Addison smiled, picking Carson up and kissing him gently "Have you been a good boy?"

"Uh-huh" Carson nodded with a smile "Did you have a good time with Daddy for your birthday?"

"I had a very good time" Addison smiled.

"I bet the people in the room next to yours didn't" Derek muttered, Addison glared at him and he cowered a little.

"So" Meredith started "Do you guys have to go or do you want to stay for lunch? I could make some sandwiches or something"

"We've got some time" Sam smiled "Go back and watch the movie buddy"

"Ok" Carson smiled as he was put to his feet, as soon as he was out of the room Addison hit Derek hard on the arm.

"Ow" he yelped "What was that for?"

"You know what" she glared, Sam and Meredith both laughed at their partners and started to make lunch as they bickered.

_Chapter 18 to follow…_


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Not to be a nag but where have all my reviewers gone? :( I know I'm still getting readers but please please don't hesitate to leave me a comment! It really does make writing much more rewarding for me! Lots of love, Kelly :)**

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><p><strong>1 month later.<strong>

"Good morning" Sam whispered as he kissed Addison awake.

"Mmm, morning" she mumbled tiredly, she cuddled into his body and he kissed the top of her hair, holding her close "I'm too warm to get up" she yawned.

"Well our boy is going to be up any minute wanting his birthday presents" Sam said with a soft laugh.

"I can't believe he's 5" Addison sighed "This time 5 years ago, I was holding him Sam, this tiny little, newborn, he was so perfect, he still is, I just, I'm so happy we made him, aren't you?"

"Of course I am babe" Sam smiled softly "And I can't wait to make all of these new memories with him"

"Y'know, he loves you more than me now right?" Addison laughed, looking up at him "It's Daddy this and Daddy that all the time"

"You are the most amazing Mom" Sam whispered, stroking her cheek gently "He's who he is because of you, I still wish I could have held him when he was a baby, I wish I could've been there for that, but now, now it doesn't matter, he's turning into a little man before our eyes and I love it, I love you"

"I know" Addison smiled, she straddled his body and kissed him firmly on the lips, Sam moaned a little and they shared a deeper kiss.

"I hear footsteps" Sam mumbled against her mouth, Addison sighed and climbed off him just in time for her bedroom door to swing open.

"It's my birthday!" Carson said loudly.

"Happy Birthday honey" Addison laughed softly "Come here my big boy" she opened her arms and Carson jumped up onto the bed, cuddling against her.

"Can I open my presents now?" Carson asked impatiently.

"Why don't we do pancakes and then presents" Sam suggested "Cuz I don't know about you but my stomach is grumbling"

"Can we have chocolate chips in them?" Carson asked "And can we make smiley faces on them?"

"Of course we can buddy, whatever you want, Happy Birthday son" Sam smiled, kissing Carson's forehead gently.

"Thanks Daddy" Carson mumbled "I'm glad you're here today, you've never been at my birthday before"

"I know little man but I promise I'll be here every year now"

"I know" Carson smiled up at him "Please can we have pancakes now?"

"Come on son" Sam laughed, he climbed out of bed and picked Carson up, throwing him over his shoulder, Carson giggled loudly as Sam carried him out of the room, Addison laughed softly and climbed out of bed, putting on her slippers and robe before heading downstairs.

~x~

"I wonder who that is" Addison yawned as she took a sip of her coffee, hearing a knock at the door.

"Ok, don't be mad but, I'm pretty sure it's my mother"

"What?" she asked with a raised eyebrow "You didn't think to tell me? Sam I'm not even dressed! God you are such a stupid man sometimes…." she continued to grumble all the way to her bedroom.

"Uh-oh" Carson laughed to himself "Daddy I think you made Mommy mad"

"I think I did son" Sam said with a soft laugh as he opened the apartment door "Hi Mom" he smiled.

"Samuel dear, it's so good to see you" Marilyn Bennett smile, giving him a tight hug "But you really should have given Addison some notice dear, I could hear her wanting to kill you on the other side of the door"

"Yeah, I didn't think it through all that much" Sam sighed "Now come in, come in, it's time you met your Grandson" he smiled "Carson come over here"

"Hi sweetheart" Marilyn smiled softly as Carson reached them "Happy Birthday"

"Thank you" Carson smiled.

"Can Grandma have a hug?"

"Yep" Carson grinned, wrapping his arms tightly around her legs, Marilyn manoeuvred herself to the nearest chair and pulled him to sit on her lap.

"Oh sweetheart you look so much like your father, he was a handsome little boy too" she smiled "Now I didn't know what kind of toys you liked but your Dad told me you love things about space, is that right?"

"Uh-huh" he nodded "I wanna be a spaceman, or a doctor, or a scientist, but I love space, my room as pictures of planets and stars and lots of cool things in it"

"Well I was thinking as your present maybe me and you and your parents if they want too, could go to the Pacific Science Center tomorrow, they have lots of exhibits and things to do that I think you would love, and maybe you could teach me a little of what you already know, how does that sound?"

"Can I go Dad, can I?" Carson said, looking back to him "Please?"

"I think that's a great idea buddy" Sam smiled "You can spend some time with your Grandma"

"Yeah" Carson smiled.

"Hey" Addison said quietly as she walked out of her bedroom "Sorry I was just, changing" she said with a small smile.

"Addison dear, look at you, you look as beautiful as ever"

"Thank you, so do you" Addison smiled "It's nice of you to come and, see him…"

"I'm here to see all of you dear" Marilyn smiled "I'd like to take you out for dinner one evening, I'm here all week, maybe the day after tomorrow if you're free, of course today is all about the birthday boy" she smiled "And I've just planned to take him to the Pacific Science Center tomorrow if that's ok with you"

"That sounds great" Addison smiled "I've always wanted to take him, and dinner sounds, good"

"Well alright then" Marilyn smiled "And don't worry Sam, I have plans for you too"

"I don't doubt that Mom" Sam said with a soft laugh "Would you like a coffee?"

"Yes please dear" she smiled, Sam took Addison by the arm and pulled her over to the kitchen.

"Breathe" he smirked.

"She's going to kill me" Addison whispered "I can't be alone with her! She'll, she'll actually kill me"

"Addison" he said with a soft laugh "This isn't Bizzy we're talking about, this is my Mom, she can't even swat flies without feeling guilty, you'll probably have a really great time, she just wants to get to know you again, this time as my beautiful partner and mother of my only son" he kissed her gently and she let out a sigh "Go on, go and play nice, we've got a party to get too soon"

"I suppose we have" she smiled, he kissed her again before she headed over to the sofa and sat down, watching as Carson chatted away happily to his Grandma.

_Chapter 19 to follow…._


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: I'm posting this even though I'm hating on the PP writers right now. Please please leave reviews, I know there are more of you out there than the amount of reviews I get, 6+ reviews would make me really really happy! :D **

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><p>"I don't understand why you're so scared" Callie said with a soft laugh as she stood with Addison in her kitchen, Carson and Sofia playing together in the living room "Marilyn seems really nice"<p>

"She is really nice, she always has been, but Sam is her pride and joy and now so is Carson and I kept that from her, she's really not going to be all sweetness and light when we're alone, I'm telling you Callie"

"Well you know how much I'll hate to say I told you so" Callie smirked.

"You love saying I told you so" Addison laughed "I guess I should go, just call me if anything happens"

"It won't"

"But if it does, if he gets a fever or feels sick, you won't be able to get hold of Sam because he'll be in surgery so just call me…."

"Addison" Callie laughed "Just give your very healthy happy son a kiss goodbye and go and have a lovely evening with your mother in law, ok?"

"Ok" Addison mumbled "You don't have to be so mean about it"

Callie rolled her eyes and gave Addison a tight hug.

"Carson, Mommy's going to meet Grandma now" Addison smiled as she walked over to him "Be a good boy for Aunt Callie ok? I'll see you in the morning"

"Promise, see you in the morning" Carson smiled up at her, she kissed the top of his head and then Sofia's.

"Bye Aunty Addison" Sofia smiled.

"Bye honey, you be a good girl too"

"Promise" she giggled mischievously.

"She is such a Sloan" Addison smirked to Callie.

"And don't I know it" Callie said with a laugh "You'll be fine Addison" Addison nodded a little with a sigh before letting herself out of the house.

~x~

"Addison, you can talk to me you know, I'm not going to bite" Marilyn said as she sat in an awkward silence with Addison over dinner.

"Sorry" Addison blushed "I guess I'm just…"

"Nervous, I know dear" Marilyn said softly "There's no need to be, you know I have always had a soft spot for you"

"That was before all of this" Addison sighed.

"You made a mistake Addison, but so did Sam, an even worse one in my book because I knew how much he loved you, how much he still loves you"

"How did you know that?" Addison asked quietly "I didn't even know if you knew about us in the first place"

"Of course I did, we may not see each other often but my Sam knows to call his mother every week" Marilyn laughed softly "You know we've always been close dear, he told me how much you were becoming to mean to him, I was the one telling him to hold on for you, I knew you'd get there eventually and you did, I'm just sorry that he was such a fool"

"We both made some mistakes" Addison sighed.

"I suppose you did, we all do Addison, but we're moving on from those mistakes now, I'm here to get to know you as well as Carson, you are my daughter-in-law after all"

"Well not technically…"

"Addison" Marilyn chuckled lightly with a roll of her eyes.

"I'm sorry" Addison said sheepishly.

"Sam always had a thing for you, did you know that? I could always see it…"

"Well he did ask me out, in our first year at med school" Addison said with a soft laugh "But I turned him down, I had a thing for Derek and Naomi, Naomi she had a thing for Sam right from the beginning of med school so, I set them up" she shrugged "We never would've worked back then, we couldn't, Naomi was my best friend and…." she took in a breath and shook her head, not being able to finish the sentence.

"It was the right thing to do at the time but times have changed" Marilyn smiled "The right thing now is for you and Sam to be together, you make him happy Addison, even before you got back together if he said your name, I could hear the smile on his face"

"I'm glad" Addison smiled, looking down a little shyly.

"When he proposes I want to know immediately, and of course when it's time for the wedding"

"We've only been together for 3 months" Addison said with a laugh "And marriage, I don't really see the point…"

"That's what divorced people say dear" Marilyn smirked, patting her arm gently "You'll call? You should call me anyway, I'm sure Sam forgets to tell me a lot"

"I'll call" Addison smiled softly "And maybe we could come and visit you, Carson, he never sees my father, I never see my father, Richard's been his only Grandparent and he's great but, he should have someone he can ask about his family"

"He can call me anytime he likes" Marilyn smiled "Now come on, let's raise a glass, to family"

"To family" Addison smiled, tapping her glass gently against Marilyn's.

~x~

"Hello" Addison giggled as she climbed into bed with Sam, instantly straddling his body before he could put down his medical journal.

"Hello" he smirked before laughing "How much wine did she give you?"

"We shared a few bottles maybe" Addison laughed "I had a good time, I didn't think you'd be home so early"

"Yeah well, the surgery didn't exactly go as planned"

"Oh" Addison said sadly "I'm sorry honey, I'm sure you did everything you could"

"Hmm" he sighed "I'm just glad I get to spend the night with you, even if you are a little drunk"

"You should be thankful that it went well" she smiled, kissing him gently.

"Oh, I am" he smiled up at her "But I already knew it would"

"I'm sure you did" Addison said with a soft laugh.

"How about I run us a hot bath, we'll have candles and good music but no more wine Dr Montgomery"

"That sounds perfect" Addison smiled "I'm going to make your bad day so much better" she whispered huskily against his lips.

"You really did drink a lot of wine" Sam murmured, letting out a laugh as Addison giggled into his mouth.

~x~

"Wake up sunshine" Sam whispered as he shook Addison's arm gently "I have coffee"

"Go away" she grumbled, burying her face into her pillow "And don't call me sunshine"

"You'd think you'd know by now that too much red wine makes your head hurt…"

"Give me the coffee smartass" Addison muttered as she sat up, taking the cup of coffee from him "You didn't care so much last night when I was all over you, you took advantage"

"Oh really?" Sam laughed "Addison I think we both know you can't be taken advantage of"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever" she yawned before sipping her coffee.

"I've gotta go and have breakfast with my Mom at her overpriced hotel, even though I offered her my place…" he sighed "Will you be ok?"

"I'll pop some painkillers and I'll be fine" Addison smiled, leaning her head against him "And your mother loves that hotel, she gets fancy room service and a Jacuzzi bath there, stop worrying and pouting about her, she's a grown woman"

"I don't know if I like you two being friends and ganging up on me" Sam laughed.

"Tough" she giggled "Now go on, go and spend time with your mother so I can get more sleep…"

"Don't sleep all day babe" Sam smiled, kissing her gently "Love you"

"Love you too" she smiled, she put her coffee down on the bedside table and pulled the covers up over her head, Sam laughed as he left the room, shaking his head in disbelief.

_Chapter 20 to follow…._


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Short-ish chapter, and yes it's christmas in Hiding My Heart land :P Hope you all enjoy and please REVIEW! Only got 4 out of the 6 reviews I wanted ;P Love to you all! **

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><p><strong>1 month later.<strong>

"Mommy" Carson whispered as he shook Addison's arm "Mommy, Mommy, Mommy"

"What Carson?" Addison mumbled, keeping her eyes closed.

"Mommy Santa brought my presents already"

"Honey it's 4am" Addison yawned as she looked at the clock "We agreed no earlier than five thirty"

"But they're just sitting there" he said with a slight grin "_Please_ Mommy"

"Wake Daddy up and then we'll see" she mumbled tiredly, her eyes closing again, she grunted as Carson clambered over her body.

"Daddy wake up" Carson said, shaking his arm "Daddy wake up, wake up, wake up it's Christmas!"

"What time is it?" Sam mumbled tiredly "Addie?"

"4am" she grumbled, "He's seen the presents and I doubt he's going to let it go"

"You are just like your big sister, do you know that?" Sam laughed softly, tickling Carson's body "She'd be up at silly o'clock at Christmas too"

"Well, we could bring the presents in here" Carson smiled "So you and Mommy don't have to get up"

"Carson Jonah Montgomery that is the best idea you have ever had" Addison laughed, pulling him into a hug "Don't you think Daddy should go and get me coffee and you some juice and all of our great presents"

"Uh-huh" Carson nodded, grinning at Sam.

"Y'know you two and that smile" Sam laughed, tickling Carson again "You both know I can't say no to that smile"

"But it's why you love us right?" Addison smiled, resting her head on Carson's.

"One of the many reasons" he smiled softly, kissing her gently "Coffee?"

"Strong coffee" she smiled "Carson baby go and help Daddy with the presents, be careful"

"Ok" Carson smiled, he ran back out into the living room and Sam stood to follow.

"You're going to fall asleep again aren't you" he smirked as he watched Addison closed her eyes.

"Just for a minute" she yawned, Sam shook his head a little and went out into the living room to get their presents.

~x~

"I think we bought him everything space and astronaut related that exists" Sam said with a slight laugh as he stood in the kitchen preparing Christmas dinner, Addison standing near to him chopping vegetables, watching Carson in the living room building his Lego space station.

"Probably" Addison laughed softly "And we're going to have to pin him down to get him to take off that NASA costume tonight"

"Well since she bought it, Amelia can come over and help" Sam smirked "Y'know we can still go and spend Christmas with everyone, it's not too late"

"No, we agreed, today is just about us" Addison said softly "We can see them tomorrow"

"I was just checking, I didn't want you to regret anything"

"I could never regret Christmas with my two favourite boys" Addison smiled, putting down the knife in her hand and stepping closer to him, kissing him gently "I love you Sam"

"I love you too babe" Sam smiled "Merry Christmas"

"Merry Christmas" she said with a soft laugh "Sam I'm, I'm so happy, I don't think I've ever been this happy, I know that's so corny but…"

"I get it" Sam smiled softly, running his fingers through her hair gently "And I feel the same"

"Daddy can I watch my new space DVD please? You can watch too from here so you know all about space stuff" Carson said as he walked over to them.

"Sure buddy" Sam smiled.

"I'll do it, you carry on cooking" Addison smiled, squeezing Sam's arm a little "It's not like I've really been helping all that much"

"Well that is true" Sam smirked.

"Mommy you can't cook" Carson giggled.

"You little monkey" Addison said, scooping him up and tickling him, making him laugh all the way to the sofa, Sam chuckled lightly to himself as he carried on making their dinner, loving the sound of Addison and Carson laughing together.

~x~

"What a day" Sam yawned as he lay back on Addison's bed, stretching out a little.

"Mmhmm" Addison nodded, climbing onto the bed next to him and snuggling into his body "Tell me Christmases get easier as they get older"

"Probably not until he's a teenager babe, sorry" Sam laughed softly "You've had a good time though right?"

"This has been, my favourite Christmas" she smiled up at him "This is what I always dreamed of for him"

Sam smiled and reached down to kiss her gently.

"I have another present for you" she grinned "Not that" she laughed when he smirked at her a little "Well, maybe that, later" she smirked, she stood up and went into her closet, coming back out with a box in her hand, Sam sat up against the headboard and she put it on his lap before sitting down next to him "I wanted to wait until now to give this to you, it's something I wanted to give you when it was just me and you so, open it" she nudged his arm lightly and he took the lid off the box and removed the thin piece of tissue paper from on top of what was inside, a scrapbook with 'Carson' written on the front.

"Look at it" Addison smiled, Sam took it from the box and started to look through every page, it started from the beginning of Addison's pregnancy all the way through to Carson's 5th birthday.

"Addison" Sam said quietly "This is, this must have taken you so much time…"

"I wanted to give you something special, I'll never, I'll never be able to give you back the time you missed with him but, I hope this helps a little"

Sam reached up and cupped her cheek; kissing her lightly on the lips "Thank you" he whispered "I will treasure this Addie"

"You don't think it's stupid?" she said quietly.

"Of course I don't" he said with a soft laugh "It is the best christmas present I have ever been given"

"Well what about Carson's glitter and macaroni pencil pot so you can always always find a pencil…"

"Well of course that too" Sam laughed.

"And then there's the lingerie I happen to be wearing under my robe" she whispered "I think you'll like that"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah" Addison grinned, she put the scrapbook back into it's box and stood to move it onto her dressing table, as she turned around she pulled on the tie of her dressing gown and shrugged it off her shoulders, climbing back onto the bed in her red lingerie, Sam following her every move with his eyes.

_Chapter 20 to follow…._


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Not sure how I feel about this chapter to be honest! But oh well lol! For those of you who haven't please check out my new Addisam fic 'You're Everything' and send some reviews my way for both fics! Love Kelly :D **

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><p><strong>3 months later.<strong>

"Hey" Sam smiled as he walked into the kitchen at the practice with Addison and Carson.

"Hi" everyone replied happily.

"Welcome back" Violet smiled, giving Addison and Sam hugs "And look at how much you've grown" she smiled, ruffling Carson's hair a little.

"Mom says I'm gonna be tall like her and Daddy one day" Carson smiled up at her.

"I'm sure you are" Violet smiled softly "So, what are you guys going to get up to this week other than spending lots of time with us"

"Just relaxing I guess" Addison smiled "We've got a week away from work, we've got to relax some time"

"Well how about Carson has a sleepover with Lucas one night" Pete suggested "You two can spend some time together"

"Are you sure?"

"Of course" Violet smiled "You'd like that wouldn't you buddy, spending a night with us"

"Can I Mom?" Carson asked, looking up to Addison.

"Sure you can honey" Addison smiled gently "It'll be nice for you to spend some time with Lucas won't it?"

"Yeah" he smiled.

"Ok so we just stopped by to say hello, you all have work to do and we need to check into our hotel" Sam smiled "So we're having dinner tomorrow night?"

"I booked us a table" Cooper smiled "I'll send you the details later"

"Ok" Sam nodded "Ok buddy, say goodbye to everyone"

"Bye everyone" Carson beamed, waving his hand.

"Bye Carson" they all smiled back, Carson giggled as Sam lifted him over his shoulder and waved all the way to the elevator.

~x~

"I do miss it here" Addison sighed as she walked arm in arm along the beach with Sam days later, Carson just ahead of them "I'm not saying I'd move back but, I do miss it"

"Well we can visit whenever we want, you know that" Sam smiled "It's not like the guys are gonna let us stay away for too long"

"True" Addison said with a slight laugh "I think, I think it's time for us to, to move in together, I want us to buy a house" she said quietly, stopping them and wrapping her arms around him "Somewhere with a garden for Carson to play, and with a master bedroom with a huge bed, and a huge closet" she said with a slight grin.

"I like the sound of that" Sam mumbled, kissing her neck "Babe do you think maybe, maybe you might want to be, a Bennett someday? Not that you have to take my name I just mean…"

"I know what you mean" Addison said softly "And, yeah, I'd really like that"

"Ok" Sam smiled.

"When we get home, we should go to City Hall, and just, do it" she smiled "Just us and Carson, and while we're there we can look into changing his birth certificate"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, seriously" Addison laughed as they started to walk again "We should've done it months ago, Carson is your son, that should be recognised"

"Thank you" he whispered, kissing her soundly on the lips "That means so much to me"

"Mom, Dad, look I wrote my name in the sand!" Carson beamed as they reached them.

"That looks great honey" Addison smiled "Carson, what would you think about, changing your name?"

"What do you mean?" Carson frowned.

"Well, your Mom and I, we were thinking about making a few changes when we get home" Sam smiled.

"Me and your Daddy are going to get married Carson" Addison said with a slight whisper as she crouched down to his level "So I'll be a Bennett, and if you want to be, you can be a Bennett too, Carson Jonah Bennett, and we're going to buy a house with a garden for you to play in, that'd be pretty cool right?"

"Really?" Carson said with a big smile "We're really gonna do that when we get home?"

"Does this mean you want too?" Addison asked with a laugh.

"Yeah" Carson nodded "I really really want us to do that Mom, we can all live together and be a big family and I can build forts outside and my friends can come and play and it'll be _so cool_"

"I'm glad you think so buddy" Sam laughed.

"This means you really love each other doesn't it, if you're going to get married? You're going to stay together aren't you?"

"Oh honey" Addison sighed, kissing his forehead gently "I love your Daddy so much, and I love you, ok?"

"Ok" Carson smiled "I love you too, and Daddy"

"We love you too son" Sam smiled "Now come on, let's see how fast you can run before we go back to the practice"

"I can run really fast" Carson grinned, running away from them quickly.

"Well, that went well" Addison laughed, Sam chuckled lightly and kissed her.

~x~

"I'm gonna be a Bennett!" Carson said loudly as he ran into the kitchen at the practice, crashing into Pete's legs "Uncle Pete I'm gonna be a Bennett like Dad and so is Mom and we're gonna buy a house and it's gonna have a garden and you can all come over and stay and it's gonna be _so cool_!"

"Did any of you understand that or do we have to explain?" Sam laughed as himself and Addison stood in the doorway.

"I think so" Pete said slowly "You were talking a little fast their buddy" he laughed.

"Sorry" Carson grinned sheepishly.

"It's not a big deal" Addison said with a small smile "It's just, for legal purposes"

"You're not fooling anyone" Charlotte smirked.

"It's still not a big deal" Addison laughed quietly "It's not going to be big, just me, Sam and Carson at City Hall when we get home"

"Carson Jonah Bennett" Carson grinned "That's gonna be my name! It's not going to take me forever to write!"

"You sure have your priorities right champ" Sam laughed.

"My what?"

"Nothing buddy" Sam smirked "So I was thinking, maybe we could all get together and have some drinks?"

"Sounds great, we need to raise a glass to you all" Sheldon smiled.

"Come over to ours" Violet smiled "We'll order in"

"It's a date" Addison smiled "I just need to go to the bathroom and then we'll get going ok?" she said, pecking Sam's lips, he smiled before she left the room.

"I believe money is owed" Charlotte announced, holding out her hand, Sam rolled his eyes and chuckled to himself.

~x~

"Hi" Naomi stuttered as she almost walked into Addison who was coming out of the bathroom "I'm not here, I just left something in my office…"

"It's fine, Naomi" Addison said quietly "It's fine, I shouldn't, expect you to avoid your own office"

"I understand" Naomi said lowering her head a little "Honestly I do"

"Naomi, I won't ever forgive you for what happened, but, I'm over it, I'm over it because, I'm happy now, with Sam, I'm happy, and we're, we're getting married, when we get home, just us at City Hall, for Carson and because, we want too, I just hope you can accept that"

"Of course I can" Naomi whispered "Addison I, all I have ever wanted since that stupid night is for, well for it to not have happened but, also, for you and Sam to be happy again, be happy together, and I am, so happy that you have that now, and I will, I will always care about you, ok?" she said tearfully "Don't ever think I don't care"

"I know" Addison nodded "And I, care, about you, even when I tried not to care, and I still hate seeing you cry" she said passing Naomi a tissue.

"Thanks" Naomi sniffled, wiping her eyes "So I'll, I'll see you then"

"I'll see you" Addison said with a small smile "We're all going to Pete and Violet's for drinks and take out, if you want to come…"

"I'll, I'll think about it, thank you" Naomi said with a small smile.

"I should get back to…"

"Sure, go" Naomi smiled "Bye Addison"

"Bye Nae" Addison nodded before walking off to find Sam and Carson.

_Chapter 22 to follow…._


	22. Chapter 22

"Good morning" Addison smiled as she walked into the doctor's lounge with Sam where Derek, Callie, Arizona and Amelia sat drinking coffee after a long over night surgery.

"Hey, welcome back" Callie smiled "How was LA?"

"LA was, really great" Addison smiled "Everyone says hello"

"And we actually have some news" Sam smiled, his arm coming around Addison's body.

"What did you do now?" Amelia sighed.

"Let them speak Amy" Derek smirked "So, what _did_ you do?"

"We actually came home yesterday" Addison smiled "We went straight to city hall and got the ball rolling on changing Carson's birth certificate, we should have done it, a long time ago, so hopefully soon he'll be Carson Bennett"

"That's great news" Arizona smiled "I'll bet Carson was happy"

"He was, but that's not all" Sam said with a slight laugh "While we were there, we kind of, got married"

"What?" Callie exclaimed.

"As soon as my I get my new lab coat and ID badge, you can start calling me Dr Montgomery-Bennett" Addison smiled, holding her hand out to show them her rings "Officially I'll be Addison Bennett but it's just easier at the hospital to keep Montgomery….please someone say something happy"

"Congratulations, both of you" Arizona smiled, standing up and kissing both of their cheeks "I guess this means you'll finally be moving in together…"

"We're thinking of getting a house" Sam smiled "I'm calling a realtor today"

"This is great guys, really" Derek smiled, shaking Sam's hand "Congratulations Addie" he said softly as he kissed her cheek.

"Thank you" Addison smiled.

"I am so mad at you for doing this without us but, if you're happy with a city hall wedding…" Callie started.

"I am" Addison smiled "It was right for us"

"Then we're going out for drinks soon ok?" Callie laughed as she hugged her tightly.

"Ok" Addison laughed quietly.

"Hold up just a second" Amelia said as she stood "I spent months watching you pine over each other, twice, I told you both to get your asses into gear more than twice, I moved to Seattle with you, I've kept your secrets, I've been there through every little piece of drama the two of you have caused and you don't even have the decency to invite me to your wedding?"

"Amelia" Addison laughed "You hate weddings"

"But it's the principle…"

Addison sighed a little and walked over to her, putting her hands on Amelia's shoulders "You have put up with our drama from pretty much the beginning, you're the little sister both of us never had, we love you, now please, forgive us?"

"Well you don't have to get all mushy about it" Amelia mumbled, shrugging her off a little, Addison rolled her eyes and laughed.

~x~

**2 weeks later.**

"Is someone we know getting married?" Addison frowned as she stood in the elevator of her apartment building with Sam, flicking through the pile of mail in her hand.

"Not that I know of, why?"

"Nothing, this just looks like a wedding invite" Addison said, handing him the cream coloured envelope with their names written in printed calligraphy on the front, he opened it as they walked to the apartment.

"Oh my god" he mumbled.

"What?" Addison yawned as they stepped into the apartment.

"It is an invite, for _our_ wedding" he laughed "There's a letter with it"

"Well what's it say?"

"Dear Addison and Sam, we know we said we were ok with the fact that you got married without us there but we were lying, so tomorrow Addison a car will be picking you up at 9am sharp to take you to The Archfield, Sam your groomsmen will be arriving shortly afterwards with suits for you and Carson, lots of love from Callie and Amelia, I can't believe them" he laughed.

"We should kill them" Addison grumbled.

"We don't have to do it, they can't force us but, if you want to do it…"

"Do you want to do it?"

"It might be nice" Sam smiled "To have everyone there"

"I guess" she sighed, biting her bottom lip "I mean I'm happy with our city hall wedding but, this might give us a chance to, really celebrate or, something"

"I would marry you every single day if I could" Sam smiled, pulling her into his arms and kissing her "I love you Addison Bennett"

"I love you too" Addison said softly "Do you think they'll make us do speeches? Because I'm good at those…"

"We could write our own vows" Sam smiled "That'd be pretty cool"

"Ok" Addison smiled "Y'know we have an hour before Meredith brings Carson home…." she squealed as Sam scooped her up in his arms, he grunted a little and she laughed "Getting a little old and tired?"

"Shut up and I'll show you quite the opposite" he smirked, carrying her into the bedroom.

~x~

"This is insane" Addison mumbled as she waited for her car the next morning.

"It's going to be a good day" Sam said softly as he ran his fingers through her hair "We're going to show all of our friends how much we love each other"

"And I get to wear a nice suit" Carson beamed up at them "I've never worn a suit before"

"I'm sure you will look very handsome honey" Addison said softly, leaning down to kiss the top of his head "You be a good boy ok? And keep your Dad and Uncles in line for me"

"Promise" Carson laughed "I'll be in charge"

"Yes you will" she laughed "Ok, I think that's for me" she said as the doorbell buzzed "I'll see you soon"

"See you soon" Sam smiled, kissing her firmly on the lips "I love you Mrs Bennett"

"I love you too, both of my Mr Bennett's" Addison smiled, she kissed Sam again before leaving the apartment.

"This is going to be so cool!" Carson grinned, Sam laughed to himself and nodded in agreement.

~x~

"Do you like it?" Callie asked worriedly as she watched Addison look at herself in the mirror of her hotel room, wearing an A-line, sweetheart necked, spaghetti strapped ivory wedding dress "I went for something simple because I knew you'd go on about how you've been married before and you feel too old and, all of that, so…"

"It's beautiful Callie" Addison smiled softly "How much…."

"Uh-uh" Arizona said, pointing her finger a little "We've all chipped in for today"

"But…."

"Addison, seriously" Amelia smirked "Just enjoy being spoilt for once"

"Ok, ok" Addison said, holding up her hands defensively "I'm sorry, I'll shut up now"

"Knock knock knock!" Sofia and Zola's loud voices said through the door, Arizona laughed and opened the door "Oh now, don't you two look beautiful" she smiled.

"Do you know how hard it was to get them dressed?" Cristina grumbled as she walked into the room with Meredith "They're so freaking excited they wouldn't stop moving"

"Well I'm glad you eventually did because now I have two gorgeous little bridesmaids" Addison smiled as twirled the girls around in their red bridesmaids dresses.

"You look beautiful too Aunt Addie" Sofia beamed "You look like a Princess"

"Thanks sweetheart" Addison said with a soft laugh.

"Bailey sends her love, she's not at all happy she's missing this" Meredith said with a laugh "I actually thought she was going to do Owen some damage when he called her to the pit"

"Right" Addison laughed "Well I'll tell her tomorrow not to worry so much, I'm surprised so many of you are here"

"We're just hoping to get through the ceremony without a pager going off" Callie sighed "Now come on, sit down, I need to do your hair"

"Yes Ma'am" Addison smirked as she took her seat, the room filling with happy chatter.

~x~

"I still can't believe you did this" Sam said with a slight laugh as he sat in the car with Carson, Mark and Alex, Derek driving them to The Archfield.

"It was all Callie, and Addie better love it or she'll probably explode" Mark laughed.

"She's been going crazy for weeks trying to get this right, Amelia was of course winding her up too which didn't help" Derek smirked.

"It's been pretty hilarious to watch" Alex laughed.

"Of course it has" Sam smirked.

"Daddy! Daddy look its Maya and Olivia!" Carson exclaimed, pointing out of the window to the front of hotel "Dad look!"

"We may have flown them out here last night" Derek smiled "I picked them up from the airport and got them settled into a room here, they can't wait"

"Again, I can't believe you all did this" Sam laughed "You really didn't have too"

"Just enjoy it while you can" Mark laughed, Derek parked up at the side of the road and handed his keys to the valet.

"Hi Dad" Maya smiled as Sam and Carson approached them "Hey Carson look at you, you're so big now, and you look so handsome in that suit"

"I know" Carson beamed up at her.

"Grandpa I'm gonna be a bridesmaid!" Olivia smiled.

"You are?" Sam said with a soft laugh "Well shouldn't you go and get your dress on?"

"We're heading up there right now, I just wanted to see you first and say, Congratulations Dad" Maya breathed out "I love you and I love Addie and, I'm so happy you're finally doing this"

"Me too" Sam smiled softly "Thank you for coming"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world" Maya said softly as she hugged him tightly "Come on Liv, let's go and surprise Addie"

"Yeah!" Olivia grinned "See you later Grandpa"

"See you later baby girl" Sam laughed, Maya waved a little at the other guys before taking Olivia up to Addison's room.

"Come on, this way" Derek said, patting Sam's shoulder and leading him through the hotel lobby.

~x~

"Who could that be?" Addison asked as there was a knock at her hotel room door "We're all here"

"Who says we're all here?" Amelia smirked as she went to open the door.

"Surprise" Maya and Olivia both grinned.

"Hey" Addison laughed "Oh my god"

"Uncle Derek flew us over last night" Maya smiled as she gave Addison a hug "I can't believe you got married without anyone there, especially your now official step-daughter"

"Yeah I know, we were stupid" Addison laughed softly "I'm glad you're here, and you" she smiled, putting her hand on Olivia's cheek "You are getting so grown up and more like your Mom every day, have you seen your Grandpa yet?"

"Uh-huh" Olivia nodded "He's really happy"

"I'm glad" Addison smiled "I'm happy too sweetheart"

"Ok Olivia, here's your bridesmaids dress" Arizona said softly as she took it from the closet.

"Thank you" Olivia beamed as she took it "Mommy look it's my favourite colour!"

"It is" Maya laughed "Now go on, go into the bathroom and change and then I'll do your hair, we haven't got long left"

"How long have we got left?" Addison asked nervously.

"30 minutes and counting" Callie smiled, squeezing her hand gently.

~x~

"Take a breath Addison" Callie said as they waited outside the doors of the wedding hall "This isn't a big deal, you're already married"

"It's stupid to be nervous, I know, I just don't want to mess this up" Addison said with a slight laugh.

"You won't" Amelia smiled "I know when you're about to mess up and this isn't it"

"Thanks" Addison laughed.

"And I'll be there to catch you if you faint"

Addison turned around to see Archer standing behind her in a suit "Archer" she breathed out "What are you doing here?"

"You need someone to walk you down the aisle don't you?" Arizona smiled.

"You look amazing Addie" Archer smiled, kissing her cheek "Not a day over 50"

"Shut up" Addison said, thumping him in the arm "I'm not 50 yet old man, you are"

"Eh, I still get the ladies" he shrugged "So you really want to do this?"

"I'm already married Archie"

"I know, but I had to ask, you need to tell me that you want to do this, that he makes you happy, you and Carson"

"He does" Addison smiled softly "He's everything we need and more, I love him"

"Well then" he said, offering her his arm "Let's do this"

"Let's do this" Addison smiled with a nod, Arizona and Amelia opened the doors and music started to play as the bridesmaids walked down the aisle finally followed by Addison and Archer, Sam turned to look at them and smiled broadly, as they reached the top of the aisle Archer shook his hand before Sam took Addison's and kissed them gently before the officiator began to speak.

"Addison and Sam, we all gather here today to celebrate your marriage in front of your family and friends" he smiled "You both offered your love to each other by exchanging vows 2 weeks ago, entering into a partnership that your family and friends have assured me will last for a very long time, so Addison, I'd like to pass this over to you to make your personal vows to Sam"

"Sam" Addison said quietly "When you came back into my life, I didn't know if I could let you in, but when I saw you with our son, when I saw him laughing, when he came home talking about you non-stop, I knew it was right, we're right" she breathed out "I've learnt to stop regretting, and look forward, and I've learnt to trust again, to trust you again, my Sam, the only person who can make me feel better with just a look, I love you, Sam Bennett, and I know now that this is it"

"And Sam, your vows to Addison"

Sam smiled and kissed Addison's hand again "It's taken us so long to get here Addie" he said softly "But now we're stronger than we ever were. I have been in love with you for so long, and any time we spent apart just made that love stronger. I know you hate the word promise because of me and how I hurt you, but if you've learnt to trust again then I hope you can trust this; I promise you, that wherever we are, whatever happens, I will be there for you, and for Carson, you can trust me to do what is right for our family. You are the love of my life, the only person I can see sitting next to me on our porch when we're old, watching our grandkids playing" he said with a soft laugh "We're Sam and Addison, Addie, we're, Addisam" he laughed, Addison shook her head a little with a laugh "We are husband and wife" he said softly "We're a family and I will love you, always"

"As you have already exchanged rings your friends and family would like to say a few words, Amelia if you would like to begin"

"Addie, Sam" Amelia smiled "You know how much I hate all the mushy love stuff but, I wanted to say something at the wedding of my two best friends, so I found a poem that I know is one of Addison's favourites;

_i carry your heart with me  
><em>_i carry it in my heart  
><em>_i am never without it, anywhere I go you go, my dear  
><em>_and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling_

_i fear no fate, for you are my fate my sweet  
><em>_i want no world, for beautiful you are my world, my true  
><em>_and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant  
><em>_and whatever a sun will always sing is you_

_here is the deepest secret nobody knows  
><em>_here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud  
><em>_and the sky of the sky of a tree called life which grows  
><em>_higher than soul can hope or mind can hide  
><em>_and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart_

_i carry you heart with me  
><em>_i carry it in my heart_

I love you guys" Amelia finished with a smile.

"Are you trying to ruin my make up?" Addison said tearfully as she hugged Amelia tightly "I love you too"

"And now" the officiator smiled "The final reading of today is from your son, Carson"

Carson smiled as he took his place, looking down at the slightly crumpled paper in his hand.

"Mommy and Daddy, thank you for being my best friends in the whole world and letting me have chocolate pudding almost every time I want it, I knew you loved each other lots and lots and now lots of people know that too, I hope you are married forever cuz I love being a family with you, lots of love from Carson"

"That was beautiful honey" Addison whispered, kissing the top of his head.

"Good work buddy boy" Sam smiled, ruffling his hair.

"And finally, I ask if you are both willing to reaffirm your vows to each other"

"We are" Addison smiled, looking into Sam's eyes.

"We are" Sam smiled back.

"Then Sam, you may now kiss your bride"

Sam grinned and pulled Addison into his arms, everyone clapping and cheering as they kissed, Addison's arms coming up and around Sam's neck.

"Love you" she whispered.

"Love you more" Sam whispered back.

"No possible" she laughed, their foreheads coming to rest together gently.

~x~

"Mmm, what a day" Addison mumbled as she lay tangled in hotel sheets with Sam, her lips coming to his naked shoulder and her leg hooking over his.

"Indeed" Sam mumbled back as he kissed her softly "I loved marrying you again"

"I loved marrying you again too" she laughed "Can you believe they all did this for us?"

"Yeah" he said softly "They care Addie, especially about you, pretty much every person there today and some that weren't would call you one of their best friends, you're amazing"

"Y'know they love you too" Addison smiled, stroking his cheek gently "You're part of this, crazy put together family, you have been for a long time"

"I know that now" Sam smiled "I don't think I've ever felt this happy"

"Me either" Addison whispered "Everything has finally fallen into place, I love you so much"

"I love you too" Sam whispered back, pulling her in for another kiss.

_Chapter 23 to follow…._

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><p><strong>AN: Yes a small wedding is nice and beautiful but like their friends would let them get away with it hahaha!**

**The poem Amelia reads is I Carry Your Heart With Me by EE Cummings and is one of my favourite poems of all time.**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Posting a day early as a belated birthday present for Ana! :) Reviews please! I'm pretty close to 100 and would love to get there by the final chapter!**

**Posted 2 new Addisam oneshots 'We Could Get Lost' and 'i know you have a little life in you yet' so if you haven't read and/or reviewed please do so! Kelly :)**

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><p><strong>2 months later.<strong>

"Aunty Addison!" Olivia beamed from next to Maya as they opened their front door to Sam, Addison and Carson.

"Hi sweetie" Addison laughed softly, reaching down to hug her tightly "I cannot believe it's your 8th birthday tomorrow"

"Me either" Maya sighed.

"Hi honey" Addison smiled, giving her a hug "How are you?"

"I'm great" Maya smiled.

"And where are my hello's?" Sam said, tickling Olivia and making her laugh loudly.

"Hi Grandpa" Olivia laughed.

"Hi Dad" Maya smiled "Did you grow Carson? You look even taller than you did 2 months ago"

"Mom says I'm growing too fast" Carson said with a smile "But I can't even see over the top of the kitchen counter unless I'm on my tip toes"

"I'm sure you'll be tall enough in no time" Maya smiled, ruffling his hair gently "Olivia are you going to say hello to your, uh…Uncle" she laughed.

"Yeah, that will never not be weird" Addison smirked.

"He can't be my Uncle Mom, he's only 5" Olivia said, rolling her eyes with the attitude of a teenager, making Sam and Addison laugh.

"Go and show Carson the garden, and play nicely" Maya said, giving Olivia a gentle push.

"Come on Carson" Olivia smiled, Addison nodded a little with a smile as Carson looked up at her, he took Olivia's hand and they ran out towards the back yard through the kitchen.

"How was your flight?" Maya asked as she led Addison and Sam through to the kitchen.

"Carson talked the entire time but it was good" Addison said with a soft laugh "This is a lovely house Maya"

"Phil's promotion really helped us out" Maya smiled "We could finally get a house of our own, it's great, do you want coffee or juice or tea, or something else, we have pretty much everything"

"Coffee would be great, thank you" Sam smiled as they sat at the kitchen table, which had a great view of the garden "So Phil is at work?"

"Yeah, but he'll be home in time for dinner, and uh, Mom should be getting here around the same time" she said with a small smile.

"Maya we might not be best friends anymore but, we're civil now" Addison smiled "We spoke when we were last in LA and we're good, you don't have to worry about anything happening"

"I wasn't worried"

"Try and sound a little more convincing baby girl" Sam smirked, Maya rolled her eyes and brought over their coffees, sitting down as they thanked her.

"So are you all set for tomorrow?" Addison asked "Do you need anything?"

"No, we're all set" Maya smiled "We sat together this morning and put together the party bags, Phil's going to do the balloons before we go to bed tonight, I've got banners and party games and one of the Mom's from Liv's school owns a bakery so she's bringing the cake and extra cupcakes for the food table, I think I have enough food to put 100 children into a food coma so, with the 30 that are coming I think I'm putting them in danger" she laughed lightly.

"Well that's the point of birthday parties" Addison laughed "Giving the kids so much sugar and then letting their parents deal with the aftermath, they get to repay you for it at their kids parties"

"Do you remember Sofia's party? Carson ate so much" Sam laughed "He lay down on the sofa and went straight to sleep when we got home"

"Well then, maybe we'll get some peace tomorrow night" Maya laughed.

"We'll see I guess" Addison laughed, looking outside to where the kids were running wild around the garden.

~x~

"I think we're going to head upstairs" Maya said with a yawn as all of adults sat in the living room "Tomorrow is going to be one hell of a day"

"Just think of the smile on Olivia's face baby girl" Sam smiled.

"I will" she said with a soft laugh, she kissed Sam, Addison and Naomi on the cheek before heading up to bed, Phil following behind her after saying his own goodnights.

"I think you should go up too old man" Addison smirked as Sam yawned loudly.

"Hey" he pouted "We're the same age y'know"

"But I'm still so young at heart" she laughed "I'll be up soon, go before you fall asleep on my arm"

"Ok" he sighed "Night babe" he whispered as he kissed her softly.

"Night" she smiled.

"Goodnight Naomi" Sam said quietly.

"Night Sam" she smiled, he stretched out a little as he stood and then headed up to the guest room.

"So" Naomi started with a small smile "How are you Addison?"

"I'm, really good" Addison smiled "How about you?"

"I'm ok" Naomi smiled "The practice is doing really well, we have some new doctors, neuro and a new OB who is um, he's interesting"

"Interesting huh?" Addison laughed.

"He's 10 years younger than the rest of us and I'm his boss it would be totally inappropriate..." she started quickly.

"It would be totally hot" Addison smirked "Does he like you?"

"We flirt, a lot, Violet says I'm like a giggling school girl around him" Naomi sighed "But I don't know, he's probably way out of my league"

"I doubt that" Addison said softly "Just ask him out, what's the harm? If it goes terribly it won't be you who needs to leave, it's your practice..."

"Addison" Naomi smirked "You're terrible, do you know that?"

"Yeah" Addison laughed "That's what friends are for right?"

"So we're, friends?" Naomi asked tentatively.

"We're friends" Addison smiled softly "We have to be, this won't be the first birthday we'll be together for, we were thinking of doing christmas out here one year, and when we're in LA, you shouldn't avoid us Naomi, I told you that before, unless we make you feel really uncomfortable..."

"You don't" Naomi smiled "At all, it's, nice to see you all so happy, you're a family Addison and Carson, he's an incredible boy"

"I don't know how I haven't screwed him up" Addison laughed lightly "He's so, smart and kind and funny, and grows every single day which means I get to shop more"

"See, there are upsides to this parenting stuff" Naomi laughed.

"Definitely" Addison smiled.

"So you and Sam, you're good now? Everything's ok?"

"We're pretty much a normal married couple, we fight all the time over the most ridiculous things like, who's turn it is to do the washing up" she laughed "But we're, really great"

"Good" Naomi smiled softly "Olivia showed me the pictures from the wedding when I was babysitting a couple of weeks ago, it looked like a beautiful day"

"Well I had nothing to do with it" Addison laughed "But it really was a great day, Callie got everything just right and I was so happy Maya could come"

"I don't think anyone gave her much choice" Naomi laughed "But she was really happy she could go too"

"Did you ever think this would be our life?" Addison sighed, curling her legs up onto the space where Sam was sitting "When we all met, did you ever think…"

"Of course I didn't, I don't think any of us could, but that was a long time ago, it was all a long time ago and the only thing I regret was losing you as my best friend, I know we drove each other crazy at times but…."

"It didn't matter because we were best friends" Addison said with a soft smile "We'll probably never get that back Nae but, we can be friends again, we can be, family again, we have to be for everyone asleep up there so, let's just focus on that"

"When did you get so, glass half full?"

"I have no idea" Addison laughed "It's scary isn't it"

"Uh-huh" Naomi smirked "But it's kind of nice too"

"Yeah, I think so too" Addison smiled softly "I'm gonna go up, I'll see you tomorrow"

"See you tomorrow"

Addison gave Naomi a hug before going up to bed, she changed into her pyjamas and climbed into bed next to Sam, snuggling up next to him.

"Mmm, you ok babe?" he mumbled.

"Mmhmm" she sighed "Go back to sleep, I love you"

"Love you too" he mumbled tiredly, he wrapped his arms around her a little tighter and they both slowly fell to sleep.

~x~

"I've missed this place" Addison sighed as she walked arm and arm with Sam through Central Park early the following morning "I haven't been here in, so long"

"This was your place" Sam smiled "You were all about Manhattan, the shopping, lunch in all the fancy restaurants, and I think now we're in the point of our careers where we're, successful enough to take time off, we can come and visit Maya whenever we can and do all of the things you've been missing"

"I'd really like that" Addison smiled "I want Carson to really know his sister, and Olivia and Phil, I never had a family like this and I want him to know how many people love him"

"He knows baby" Sam smiled, kissing her temple gently "He's got a lot of places to run away too when he hates us" he laughed.

"Oh sshh" Addison laughed, swatting his arm "He'll never hate me, he's a Mommy's boy"

"Maya was a Daddy's girl until she turned 13…"

"Stop trying to age him, and me" she pouted, Sam laughed and stopped them still, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her soundly on the lips, Addison moaned a little as she wrapped her arms around his neck "You just did that to shut me up" she whispered against his mouth.

"Uh-huh" he smirked "We've got a lot of time to spend with Carson, and when he does get older, a long time from now, we'll be able to retire in our beautiful home and do what the hell we want with our time, we can take walks and vacations and, just be together, even when we drive each other crazy"

"Well we do that already sometimes" Addison laughed softly "I love that you think about all of that, our future"

"Of course I do" he smiled "Don't you"

"Every day honey" she whispered, kissing him again "We should probably get back soon, Maya needs help setting up the party"

"5 more minutes, then we'll go back" Sam smiled, linking their arms together and continuing to walk through the park in a comfortable silence.

_Chapter 24 to follow…._


	24. Chapter 24

**8 months later.**

"Hey" Addison said tiredly as Sam walked into their bedroom "You're home"

"Finally" he breathed out as he lay face down on the bed, Addison crawled closer to him and massaged his shoulders "Keep doing that" he mumbled.

"Scoot up, I'll give you a real one" she whispered, she reached over to the bedside table and searched out for the massage oil, Sam took off his shirt and pants leaving him in just his boxers and settled himself into the pillows with a heavy sigh, Addison straddled his body and put a little massage oil into his skin, massaging it in slowly but firmly "What's on your mind honey?" she asked softly.

"Nothing" he sighed "I'm just a little tense that's all"

"Are you sure?"

"2 years ago, 2 years ago I didn't even know Carson existed, and for that to happen my baby girl was in an accident that could have killed her, I know we're happy now, and I know we've forgiven each other for our past mistakes, but it just kills me that I wasn't here"

"I'm sorry" Addison whispered.

"No, don't, don't apologize, that wasn't my intention, I just, I've just been thinking about it that's all"

"I hate that you found out about Carson the way you did, but 2 years ago I finally realised what I'd been missing, _you_" she said softly "I love you Sam, and I always will"

Sam carefully turned over onto his back and reached up to pull Addison down into a kiss "I love you too babe, the past 2 years have been a whirlwind, a great one"

"Carson is asleep" she whispered "You're already half naked, how about we step this whirlwind up a notch"

"I like the sound of that" Sam murmured, pulling her back into another more passionate kiss.

~x~

"IT SNOWED!" Carson yelled as he burst into his parents bedroom, bounding onto the bed causing Sam to grunt as he kneed him in the leg "Come on wake up it snowed!"

"Carson" Addison groaned "What have we said about yelling in the morning?"

"But it snowed!"

"Well the ER is going to be a nightmare today" Sam muttered.

"Sam" Addison glared as she climbed out of bed and put on her robe and slippers, opening the curtains "Wow it's really coming down out there"

"This is supposed to be the snowiest January yet" Carson beamed "My teacher said it said so on the weather news"

"The weather news huh?" Addison laughed softly "Sam come on, come and look, it's beautiful"

Sam climbed out of bed, shivering a little as he was in only his boxers, he wrapped his arms around her from behind and rested his chin on her shoulder "It is beautiful" he said quietly "Just like you"

"Suck up" she chuckled lightly, he laughed and kissed her shoulder gently.

"Can we go into the backyard and play?" Carson asked "_Please?_"

"Go on, go and get dressed" Sam laughed "But only for a little while because we need breakfast, I'll make something warm, wear layers buddy"

"I will" Carson called out over his shoulder as he ran back to his room.

"Ready to get your ass kicked by the best snowball fighter in the house?" Addison grinned as she turned in Sam's arms and wrapped hers around his neck.

"You may have won last year but that's only cuz I let you"

"Sure you did" she laughed, she kissed him firmly on the lips "Well the fights on for real this year, _honey_"

"Oh it's really on" he laughed as they both went into their closet to change.

~x~

"We are the champions!" Carson yelled as he ran into the kitchen after spending almost an hour outside in the snow.

"Put it here champ!" Sam grinned, holding his hand up, Carson jumped up and hi-fived him.

"That was so unfair" Addison pouted as she took off her hat, scarf and gloves "You're supposed to be on my team Carson, that's how I won last year"

"That's how _we_ won Mom" Carson laughed "And I'll be on your team next year! I have to keep changin' so it's fair!"

"Hear that, you can win again next year" Sam laughed softly as he kissed her cold nose "Now how about I make breakfast, I'm thinking scrambled egg, bacon, sausage, hash browns and a little toast"

"That sounds great" Addison smiled "But can we at least have some fruit with it so I don't feel completely unhealthy?"

"Ok" he smiled "Carson why don't you and your Mom cuddle up on the sofa and watch some cartoons, I think she needs a Carson hug to get her warm"

"Sure" Carson beamed "Come on Mom" he took her hand and pulled her out of the kitchen, Addison laughed and pulled him onto her lap as they sat on the sofa, he turned on the TV with the remote and put on his favourite channel "That was really fun wasn't it" he smiled "I love snow"

"Me too honey" Addison smiled, kissing against his hair gently "We're probably going to get called into the hospital soon, your Aunts and Uncles will too so Sofia and Zola will be in daycare as well"

"I know" Carson sighed heavily "This always happens when it snows, Aunt Amelia says it's cuz some people don't know how to drive in snow and get their brains smashed open so she has to fix them"

"Of course she did" Addison sighed, rolling her eyes a little "Well people do have accidents in the snow, but people also have a lot of fun in the snow like we just did"

"I know" Carson smiled, cuddling her a little "I love you Mom"

"I love you too sweetheart" she said softly "You're really growing up Carson, it's a little scary to me, but just so you know, you will always be my baby boy, even when you're grown up and moved out, and when you bring a girl home for the first time I'll have all of your baby pictures waiting here to embarrass you with"

"Ew, I'm not gonna bring a girl home" Carson laughed "That's gross Mom"

"Oh, right, I'm sorry" Addison chuckled "So I'm the only girl in your life?"

"Uh-huh" he nodded, he let out a content sigh and snuggled into her body more, Addison smiled and kept her arms around him until Sam called them for breakfast.

~x~

"Hey" Amelia said with surprise as Addison walked into the attending's locker room to change into some scrubs "I didn't think you were in today"

"It's crazy in the ER, all hands on deck" Addison smiled "Sam had to rush off so I took Carson to daycare where Zola and Sofia were waiting to persuade him into their "girly games" to quote him, how long have you been here?"

"Too long" Amelia yawned "Just taking a minute before I go back out there, I'm aching in places I didn't know possible"

"Me too" Addison laughed softly.

"Rough night with the hotsbund?" Amelia smirked as she poured out two coffees.

"Hotsbund?"

"Hot husband" Amelia said simply.

"Right" Addison laughed "No, well, yeah but that's not why I'm aching, we had a snowball fight with Carson this morning and I ended up on my ass more than once"

"Not as agile as you used to be?" Amelia teased, Addison hit her with a glare "Ready to go out into the madness?"

"As I'll ever be" Addison sighed, pulling her scrub top on and running her fingers through her hair before they headed out into the busy hospital.

~x~

"Hey honey" Addison smiled, coming up behind Sam at the nurses station, her hand coming to his back as she leant against the counter "I'm gonna go and grab Carson and head home"

"I think I'm gonna be here all night" he sighed "You go, I'll call in the morning"

"Ok" she said with a small smile "Kiss me goodbye"

"Ok" he laughed softly, he turned and pulled her into a gently kiss "I love you Mrs Bennett"

"I love you too Mr Bennett" she whispered "See you at home"

"See you at home" he smiled, Addison kissed him once more before going to pick up Carson and finally heading home.

_Chapter 25 to follow…._

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><p><strong>AN: Oh so fluffy. Next chapter is the final one, I'm not happy with it at all and changed it a million times but just forgive me for it since I'm giving you more Addisam fics soon! Reviews please, almost at 100! :D**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Changed bits of this again at the last minute! I contemplated this time jump a lot but in a way I'm happy with it, I love writing in this 'universe' and I'm seriously considering the odd oneshot, having this time jump will allow me to fill in certain gaps in the future, not promising anything but it's definitely on my list of ideas! Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed this fic, it really means a lot to me, I write for my own personal satisfaction but it always makes me so much happier when I know there are people out there reading and enjoying my fics!**

**This final chapter is for my Addisam gang on twitter! I shouldn't have to name you for you to know you belong there haha :P Lots of love, Kelly xx**

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><p><strong>10 years later.<strong>

"Carson Bennett get your ass out of bed!" Addison yelled up the stairs for the 3rd time that morning, well, mid-morning.

"God Mom I'm coming!" he groaned, she heard his feet hit the floor and stomp around his room.

"That boy" Addison grumbled as she walked into the kitchen where Sam was making her a coffee.

"Honey he's 16, getting up before noon isn't in his programming" he chuckled lightly.

"He's just a lazy boy Mom" 9 year old Jessica giggled.

"Yes he is sweetheart" Addison laughed softly "I just don't want to be late for Mason's birthday, and you need to go and put on your dress"

"Ok" Jessica smiled, skipping off to her room.

"She's getting too big" Sam sighed "I don't want her to grow up, I want her to be 2 years old again"

"She's going to be your little girl no matter what Sam, look at Maya" Addison said with a soft laugh "Don't you remember the day we signed the adoption papers? She clung onto you so hard, she was a Daddy's girl from day one"

"I know, I remember" he smiled softly.

"Hey" Carson grumbled as he walked into the kitchen sleepily, going to the refrigerator and taking out the carton of milk juice, he screwed off the top and gulped some back.

"I really wish you wouldn't drink out of the carton" Addison sighed.

"Relax Mom, we have the same genes, I used to live _in_ you" he smirked as he put the carton away "So when's this kids party thing?"

"We're leaving at 12 so clean up, Mason needs his role model to look like one"

"Yes Mom" Carson laughed "Dad will you tell her to trust me, _you_ know I'm not turning into an alien because I'm 16 now right?"

"Oh sshh you, both of you" Addison said, swatting them both on their arms as they laughed.

"Love you Mom" Carson smiled, dropping a kiss on the top of her head before running up to his room.

"See, he still loves you" Sam teased, nudging her lightly, Addison hit his arm again and pouted as he kissed her cheek gently.

~x~

"Carson!" Mason Robbins-Torres yelled as he ran straight towards Carson "I'm 8 today!"

"You sure are dude" Carson said, giving him a high-five "Happy Birthday"

"Hi sweetheart" Addison smiled, reaching out to run her fingers through Mason's hair "Happy Birthday"

"Thanks Aunt Addie" Mason smiled.

"Happy birthday Mason!" Jessica beamed, giving him a hug he was reluctant to receive, Addison laughed and shook her head a little.

"We've got your present right here buddy but I'm gonna give it to your Mom so you can open it later ok?" Sam smiled.

"Thanks Uncle Sam" Mason beamed "I've gotta go be the host with the most whatever that means" he shrugged before running off, Jessica chasing after him.

"I'm gonna go, find people…" Carson said before heading through to the living room, Addison and Sam went into the kitchen of the Robbins-Torres house where their friends were all chatting away.

"Hey" Callie smiled giving them both a hug "Thanks for coming"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world" Addison smiled "Are you stressing?"

"Always" Callie laughed "At least Mason's a little easier to please than his sisters"

"He's having the time of his life Cal" Addison smiled softly "What can I do to help?"

"You can make conversation, _Sam_ can help with the food" Callie laughed, Addison grumbled as they both laughed at her.

~x~

"Hey Sofia your Mom….what the hell?" Mark yelled as he found Carson and Sofia making out on her bed, he grabbed Carson by the back of his shirt and pulled him off.

"Dad!" Sofia shouted "Dad don't hurt him!"

"Hurt him? I wanna kill him!"

"Uncle Mark, please" Carson said shakily, looking at him with fearful eyes "We were just kissing I swear, we haven't, we haven't done anything else and we won't, I swear we won't…"

"Sure as hell you won't! Get your ass downstairs right now!" he snapped "And you young lady!"

Carson hung his head low, walked out of Sofia's room and down the stairs.

"What's going on? We heard yelling" Callie said quietly.

"Get Arizona, Sam and Addison in the kitchen, now" Mark said firmly, a few moments later and they were all in the kitchen.

"What's going on?" Addison asked curiously.

"What's going on is I just caught your son on top of my daughter!" Mark growled "Luckily his hand was over her shirt because I swear to god if it was under I would have chopped it off!"

"Carson!" Addison exclaimed "What the hell are you thinking?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Callie frowned "Is Sofia not good enough for him?"

"You know I wasn't saying that" Addison sighed "I love Sofia, I love you sweetheart, but this isn't a good idea, you were practically…"

"Raised together, we know Mom" Carson sighed heavily "Believe me we have talked and talked about this, about all the excuses you guys would come up with to keep us apart but, we really, really want to make this work, we wouldn't do this if we didn't think we could make this work _because_ of the fact that we grew up together, I've loved Sofia like family since I was born and I will always love her, now I just, love her like my girlfriend"

"Aw" Arizona gushed "Carson honey as long as you treat her right I don't care"

"Arizona!" Mark exclaimed.

"What exactly is your problem Mark?" Sam sighed "Sure they went the completely wrong way about this and should have told us instead of letting us find out like this but, what's the big deal?"

"Teenage pregnancy runs in your family" he snapped.

"That's uncalled for" Sam snapped back "Don't you bring Maya into this, and don't make out like this is all on Carson, he's your family too, we have always said we are all a family so you need to grow up, I know it's, hard to find your baby girl with a guy, trust me I know, but you, and all of us, need to trust that they will know what are the right decisions and the really wrong ones, can we trust you to do that?" he said, turning to Carson and Sofia.

"I swear Dad" Carson breathed out.

"We promise Uncle Sam" Sofia smiled "Dad, you can trust us, you can trust me, come on please don't be mad, we won't ever make out in the house again"

"Come on Mark, give them a break" Callie sighed "We've got a party to get on with"

"I swear to god if you hurt her, family or not I will make you pay"

"I won't do that Uncle Mark, I promise!"

"Hey guys everyone's getting a little impatient out there" Zola said as she walked into the room "Oh, crap" she stuttered "I told you guys not to make out in the house!" she exclaimed.

"Of course you knew about this" Callie laughed.

"And she's been a complete Mom about it" Sofia laughed quietly.

"I gave them the safe sex lecture and everything" Zola smirked.

"Zola!" Sofia and Carson exclaimed.

"Not that they're doing that of course" Zola said quickly "They're not, I promise you, and I'd know, they'd tell me"

"Mom when are you bringing out the cake?" Mason said impatiently as he walked into the room.

"Right now sweetheart" Callie smiled "Come on everyone, let's go and sing Happy Birthday, ok? Mark?"

"Yeah, fine, ok" he sighed "But again, I'm warning you Carson…"

"I promise, I won't hurt her" Carson said firmly, as Mark left the room everyone else took that as their cue to follow.

~x~

"So, are you really mad at me?" Carson asked as he sat with Addison watching TV that evening "For being with Sofia"

"I'm not mad just, a little shocked"

"You can't be that shocked Mom, we know you used to joke about us" he laughed.

"Well that's different, you were just little kids then, you're still young now"

"Plenty of my friends have girlfriends, we're 16, and I really, really love her Mom, I'm not saying we know we're going to be together forever or anything sappy like that, but we're good now, and we're not rushing into anything, I swear"

"You are so much like your father" Addison said softly, reaching out and stroking his cheek "Make sure you stay that way"

"I'll try Mom" he said quietly.

"So how long have you guys been hiding this from us? I wanna know how good you are at keeping secrets from me" she laughed.

"6 months" Carson smirked "But I haven't exactly lied I just, didn't tell you, when I said I was hanging out with Zola and Sofia I was, sometimes Zo just, left early, please don't tell Uncle Mark any of that, he already has enough reasons to hate me"

"Oh honey he doesn't hate you" Addison said with a soft laugh "He's just playing the protective Dad card, he'll calm down and you'll be at the batting cages with him again next weekend"

"I don't know if being around him and a bat is a great idea" Carson laughed "But I guess you're right"

"Honey I'm always right" Addison smirked, Carson rolled his eyes and she laughed, reaching over to kiss his temple before he had a chance to shrug her off.

~x~

"Can you believe Carson and Sofia?" Addison sighed heavily as she climbed into bed next to Sam "I hope they don't regret this"

"They won't" Sam said softly "They're not stupid, they wouldn't risk all of our history if they didn't really want to make this work, I know they're only 16 but they're smart, they won't, be like Maya and Phil"

"Mark didn't mean to bring them up y'know" she said softly "He was just being Mark and clutching at straws, he forgets what he was like as a teenager, and the fact that he has his own grandson out there somewhere"

"I know, I get it" Sam said quietly "We were both too good as teenagers" he smirked as he wrapped his arms around her "It was adulthood where we messed up a little"

"Well we've had a good run since then" she laughed.

"We have" he smiled, kissing her gently.

"Do you still love me now I'm old?" Addison asked quietly "I'm still attractive right?"

"You are the most attractive woman I know" Sam smiled, squeezing her ass to make her laugh "And you're not old, _we_ are not old, we still have a lot of years in us yet babe"

"You always know what to say" she laughed "You always have"

"Cuz I'm perfect for you right?" he teased.

"Absolutely" she smiled, she let out a content sigh and cuddled into his warm body "I love you Sam"

"I love you too baby" he murmured against her hair.

"Daddy?" they heard Jessica sniffle as the door creaked open "Dad?"

"Yeah baby girl, what is it?" he asked quietly "You should be asleep"

"I had a bad dream again"

"Come here sweetheart" Addison said, pulling back the covers so she could climb in, she got in between her parents and cuddled up to Sam, Addison shuffled closer and wrapped her arm over Jessica so she held onto Sam's waist gently, she kissed her daughters soft hair and they sat quietly for a minute, before they knew it they were all fast asleep.

_The End._


End file.
